Share Your Story

You’re not alone. Please share your story here so that others can benefit from your experiences. We can help each other heal and can take action together.

* Please note that we do not share your information with other organizations. We are here to support you and we may reach out to you to learn more about your story. Please let us know immediately via email if you are contacted by groups other than Kasem Cares as a result of your communication with us.

    Zig shared a story:

    My sister illegally appointed herself Moms POA-with the help of a Financial Planner whom wasn’t an Attorney to make the Trust change. I spent years being hurt over this as sister whom lived out of state liquidated assets over $600,000. hid money after writing inventory twice of cash-1 years apart-said that she made a financial error. Not involving Attorney or Notary as promised a month before. Then brings Mom while always lacking capacity to an Attorney to do the same change that was illegally done 5 years before-to protect herself. I reported inventory to APS, Police, FBI-all did nothing because its Civil-WOW. Brought to court and court doesn’t investigate for Elders protection and states- yeah miss counted extra 80% of cash, its what the guardian says and that’s all that is being considered. Looked for money in only one place when other evidence attempted to be presented to disprove decision- was rejected-was threatened to shut up or get thrown out of court room-?
    Justice for Sale in the OC.
    Appellate Court denied also for a technicality. They too ignored fact that same attorney consulted with Appellate-represented Respondent-Ignored. Now Moms health is again is compromised and Im being denied her closest child to know anything about ailing condition that appears eminent more recently than expected.

    SOMETHING WILL CHANGE THIS SYSTEM-GOD WILLING-ITS UNFATHOMABLE.

    Beth aka shared a story:

    Beth aka shared a story:

    Beth shared a story:

    I may not be an elderly lady yet, but I will in time. I am a young blind woman who was guardianized as a result of a big lie the Florida courts told me and as a result of manipulative and controlling parents who did not feel that I was living a safe life according to them. AS a blind person, and as a blind person with secondary mental health diagnoses up my belt, I found it hard to fight the guardianship. It is not full, but the key parts of the guardianship that my parents have control over are marriage, medical records and treatment, legal residence, social affairs, most of the rights adults would normally have by eighteen, but sadly, I didn’t get. I could however vote, hold a fast food job, travel, and apply for government benefits. I left Florida in 2010 because I wanted to have a distanced rehabilitation program in Littleton take over my rehabilitation. I went to the Colorado Center for the BLind, a school in Littleton that allows me to learn independence skills like cooking, cleaning, and traveling around the city of Denver. Because they stressed me out more, making me clean other people’s messes for being late, and because it became a trigger for me because before then, I was treated like a maid by my parents, I now have a PCA clean my apartment. Otherwise, I have a loving partner who is trying to help me get through this. SInce the guardianship has no weight in Colorado, I’ve come to a point where I want my medical privacy and the right to get pregnant but I’m afraid that my parents could book me a flight home to them, where there is no transport, no buses, and worst of all, isolation, drugs, and no friends to help me at all. They’d tell me to go to their inaccessible gym, which while it’s good for anyone to exercise, I am not allowed to talk about most subjects I prefer when around my parents. They try to control my every move, and plan to keep the guardianship because I don’t have a job. The thing is I’ve been in Colorado for 7 years and have been distant from my family since now I have a life. I sing in the Soar Youth and Adult Choir in Denver, under the direction of Emily Martin. My parents, however, live in Brevard County, Florida. I can’t get my therapists to communicate with them that my medical privacy is important because my intimate sexual details with partners would be revealed, and I am getting sick and tired of telling doctors not to add sexual details to my reports for fear that my religious family could kill me, my future husband, or future babies. As a blind person with another disability, I tried every bit of free legal recourse, including Legal Shield, but the attorneys in Brevard County won’t take my case. I have even tried contacting Disability Rights organizations, but they won’t help. As my life progresses, I’m afraid that I would become one of the isolated, drugged-to-death elders that populate nursing homes in Florida. If I could change one thing about this situation, it would be to tell my parents off for having guardianship and for hurting relationships with other people as a result. Men would run away from me and after seeing a friend freed by Kasem Cares, I personally feel that this is my last hope. I could be told to go home at any given moment, but I was told to get the police on them, but not sure how effective that will be. The moral of this story: don’t get guardianship of a blind person and do this to cover up your own failures. My parents’ guardianship was justified in their minds by me hanging out with a 51-year-old guy at 17, which though scary, was not perceived as predatory by me. The guy, however, was not the best at being good anyway, but the parents freaked out and started accusing him of grooming me for sex, but little would I know that this would ruin my whole life, which it shouldn’t. IF I were governor, or President, I would illegalize this case and make all guardianships illegal for all persons with a capacity for indpendence, and encourage strongly all parents to get some kind of education on disability and sex before they make any decisions at all.

    Yolanda shared a story:

    Update- My mom is with my older sister now and safe – thanks for the help. Please update and remove personal info, names, numbers from last post

    Danna shared a story:

    I’m not comfortable sharing my story anymore but I want to lend my support to all of you suffering from this terrible crime. It’s a lonely business. There are still people who are close to me who have no idea what it’s like to experience elder abuse with a parent. Hang in there and do NOT stop visiting, if at all possible.

    Doug shared a story:

    Hello, My Dad is in the later stages of Alzheimer’s and two of my sister’s one of which has power of attorney have told the nurses at the assisted living center where my Dad is, not to give me any information at all about how my Dad is doing. I live ten and a half hours away from the assisted living center where Dad is and as of now I don’t even have a vehicle or the funds necessary to visit my Dad. Unlike my two sisters I am on a very low income($778 a month) and after my bills are paid I’m lucky if I have $20 left over. The pain and heartache has gotten too much to bear and the thought that I will never see my Dad again before he passes is something I’m having a great deal of trouble even thinking about. I myself have severe cirrhosis and the daily pain of that and the thought of not seeing my Dad has put me on the very edge of not wanting to go on any longer. The reason my two sisters have kept my Dad’s well being from me is because I haven’t gone down to see him before now and they feel that I should have. They fail to realize that I don’t have what it takes to make the long drive down to see my Dad, something I have wished I was able to do for quite awhile now. I have prayed to God for help, but it seems as if my prayers have fallen on deaf ears. If I could only explain how much pain this causes me!

    Annette shared a story:

    My husband is locked up for a least five years by Elizabeth greile an a p s worker she did not investigate anything a disgruntled drug addict made up a story because she wants to be a Care giver for him and I don’t like her so now our lives are destroyed able guardian ad litem is stealing his retirement and I am a 70yr homeless wife of 31yrs and not allowed to be near my husband this asp woman needs to be gone she lies and gets her way it’s all about money we need protection from asp my husband sits by a window
    All day with tears in his eyes hoping his wife will show up to get him she declared him incompetent herself no doctor and illegally got a no contact order he can’t see any body he wants to see now he wants to die and so do I

    Jennifer shared a story:

    My Grandpa was a victim of elder abuse by his second wife. A few months after my beautiful and wonderful Grandma passed away, the love of his life for over 50 years- my Grandpa went on various senior citizen trips etc. One fateful day he met the woman who would become his second wife on one of those trips.

    We tolerated her for my Grandpa’s sake but she ran hot and cold so she was hard to connect with.

    The control issues started when she made him take down pictures of his kids and grandkids. Then once they moved to Arizona from Minnesota, the isolation started.

    We would try calling him but the phone would always be off the hook, so she would turn around and tell him his family didn’t care. We later found out she also told parishioners at their church and neighbors that my grandpa had no family.

    When we could fly to Arizona to visit, she played the gate keeper and we could only visit on certain days and not for very long. She would start to put ideas in my grandfather’s head that we were going to steal his money etc. We could never have alone time with him, she had to be a part of every conversation and interrupt.

    Fast forward some time later, his wife was battling cancer and hired in home help.
    By the grace of God, this nurse found an address book and contacted my Aunt letting her know that my Grandpa was being hit by his wife. The wheels were set in motion to get my Grandpa out of that abusive situation and back to Minnesota. Can you believe despite this woman battling cancer, she still found the strength to abuse my Grandpa?

    By the time guardianship was established which was a long process, and at first had been denied. Thankfully Grandpa was finally able to come home to Minnesota where he got to spend the last 3 months of his life with his family and rightfully buried next to the love of his life.

    His evil second wife died three months later.

    My Grandpa was her fifth husband. We also learned that she had pulled the same isolation and abuse on husband number 4 before he died.

    My heart aches for those who are going through similar situations. It is so devestating and makes for a painful chapter in a family’s legacy.

    Helen shared a story:

    Our father was killed in April. His wife has excluded us from everything. We don’t even have ashes. Wr have contacted many lawyers and have been told we don’t have a leg to stand on legally. In the last year of my fathers life we saw him very little. His wife always found an excuse to cancel meeting. We weren’t aloud to just go to see him. Now we have nothing that was our fathers. Nothing!

    Jacqueline shared a story:

    Elder Rage: How to Survive Caring for Aging Parents
    By Jacqueline Marcell, Author, “Elder Rage” (www.ElderRage.com)

    For eleven years I pleaded with my challenging elderly father to allow a caregiver to help him with my ailing mother, but he always insisted on taking care of her himself. Every caregiver I hired soon sighed in exasperation, “Jacqueline, I just can’t work with your father. His temper is impossible to handle and he’s not going to accept help until he’s on his knees himself.”

    When my father’s inability to continue to care for my mother nearly resulted in her death, I stepped in despite his loud protests. It was so heart-wrenching to have my once-adoring father be so loving one minute and then some trivial little thing would set him off and he’d call me nasty names and throw me out of the house. I took him to several doctors and even a psychiatrist, only to be flabbergasted that he could act charming and sane when he needed to.

    Finally, I stumbled upon a thorough neurologist, specialized in dementia, who put my parents through a battery of blood, neurological, memory tests and PET scans. After ruling out numerous reversible forms of dementia such as B-12 and thyroid deficiency, and evaluating their many medications, he shocked me with a diagnosis of Stage One Alzheimer’s in both of my parents – something all their other doctors missed entirely.

    What I’d been coping with was the beginning of Alzheimer’s, which begins intermittently and appears to come and go. I didn’t understand that my father was addicted and trapped in his own bad behavior of a lifetime of screaming and yelling to get his way, which was coming out now in intermittent over-the-top irrationality. I also didn’t understand that “demented does not mean dumb” (a concept not widely appreciated) and that he was still socially adjusted never to show his Mr. Hyde side to anyone outside the family. Conversely, my mother was as sweet and lovely as she’d always been.

    Alzheimer’s makes up 60-80% of all dementias and there’s no stopping the progression nor is there yet a cure. However, if identified early there are some FDA approved medications (more in clinical trials) that in most patients can mask dementia symptoms and keep patients in the early independent stage longer.

    Once my parents were treated for the Alzheimer’s, as well as the often-present depression in dementia patients, and then my father’s volatile aggression, I was able to optimize nutrition and fluids with much less resistance. I was also able to manage the constant rollercoaster of challenging behaviors. Instead of logic and reason, I learned to use distraction and redirection. I capitalized on their long-term memories and instead of arguing the facts, I lived in their realities of the moment. I learned to just go-with-the-flow and let the hurtful comments roll off while distracting with a topic of interest from a prepared list. And most importantly, I was finally able to get my father to accept two wonderful live-in caregivers and not drive them to quitting. Then with the tremendous benefit of Adult Day Health Care five days a week for my parents and a support group for me, everything finally started to fall into place.

    Alzheimer’s disease afflicts more than 5.4 million Americans, but millions go undiagnosed for many years because early warning signs are chalked up to stress and a “normal” part of aging. Since 1 in 6 women and 1 in 11 men are afflicted by age 65, and nearly half by age 85, healthcare professionals of every specialty should know the 10 Warning Signs of Alzheimer’s and educate their patients so everyone can save time, pain, money, heartache… and a fortune in Kleenex!

    TEN WARNING SIGNS OF ALZHEIMER’S
    www.ElderRage.com/Alzheimers.asp



    Jacqueline Marcell is the author of Elder Rage, a Book-of-the-Month Club selection receiving 50+ celebrity endorsements www.ElderRage.com/Review.asp and 580 5-Star Amazon reviews. Excerpt: www.ElderRage.com/SampleChapter.asp. Available in Print, Audio, eBook: http://www.ElderRage.com/Order-2012.asp.

    Jacqueline is also an international speaker on Alzheimer’s, as well as Breast Cancer which she survived after caring for her parents. www.ElderRage.com/SpeakingEngagements.htm

    Mary shared a story:

    My dad was diagnosed with brain cancer in March of 2013. Up until this time he was very independent. He drove, paid his bills, visited people….. To make a long story short, doctor appointments were rescheduled or cancelled without my knowledge, medication was not properly administered, the alleged perpetrator told the doctor he was on medication that he was not on…… The alleged perpetrator talked my father into treatments my dad said his entire life he did not want. My father was taken to his bank (not the normal branch he went to) where he closed out his accounts…… he was taken to a lawyer and his will was changed…….. His landline blocked my calls as well as the calls from the catholic church he had attended for close to 40 years, he was no longer attending that particular church. APS was involved, and one of the investigators told me he thought my dad was being abused, but he could not prove it.

    My dad eventually ended up in the hospital . The person who lived at his house would not make modifications to the home to accommodate his needs, would not hire a caregiver….. and eventually would not allow my father back into his own home. My father moved in with us for the last month of his life and died peacefully in our home surrounded by our family while my dad’s attorney tried to evict the person living in his home. Following my dad’s death was a long and drawn out probate & we contested nothing. It was initiated and fueled by the perpetrator. One of the APS supervisors told me he forwarded one of the employees of the church to law enforcement for failure of a mandatory reporter to report suspected abuse. I also received a letter from the vicar general of the diocese who apologized for any ways in which anyone from the church left me feeling hurt, disrespected or dismissed.

    Again for the sake of brevity a lot of details have been omitted.

    Kathleen shared a story:

    I had an elderly bachelor uncle who lived on Waterfront Property on Raft Island in Gig Harbor, Washington who sold his home and moved into a major local Retirement Home in Tacoma, Washington. He was talked into selling and was swindled on the sale. The Realtor found an Independent Caregiver through the Retirement Home. I picked up on her right away and kept calling Adult Protective Services. She kept moving him around and was slowly turning him away from our family. No one would tell me where he was. I had to contact the Police on some occasions. She took his car away from him lying about why and sold it. She finally got Power of Attorney on him. He said he didn’t sign anything and didn’t give it to her. I had a Private Investigator run a Background Check on her and discovered she stole from others. APS got back involved and went to his Bank where they discovered she stole thousands of dollars from him and moved his accounts around putting them in her name. One account said “Pay on Death” to her. He had a Pension. APS froze his accounts and removed her and brought in a Professional Legal Guardian. She was to keep me updated on what was going on with him. She charged his account every time she spoke to me. No one could give me any information because he had a Legal Guardian and I was told things through her. I contacted my local Washington State Senator who opened up an investigation and got a law passed here in Washington State on FBI Background Checks on Long Terms Caregivers and throughout the Country. After his death I was able to hire an Attorney who made me personal representative of his Estate. He was able to get all the paperwork the State filed in The Kitsap County Courthouse. I was able to sue the Bank for failing to report Financial Abuse. We found out that Bank Employees are “Passive Reporters” NOT “Mandated Reporters.” There needs to be a law made about that. I am writing a Screenplay about his story hoping to put an emphasis on Elder Abuse. Thank you.

    Deborah shared a story:

    My Father had Parkinson’s and mild dementia a Doctor’s order had been sent to his assisted living facility saying he could travel with assistance but needed to be in assisted living once he got to Alaska( where my mother is from) Not My blind handicapped mother and to live in my cousins over crowded apartment . The inconsistency in care (WHICH I TOLD THE ASSISTED LIVING HOME THEY WERE IN) took my father from mild dementia to deep dementia in 9 weeks. Then he was hospitalized moved to 3 different homes in Alaska within a year and 3 mos. he died. Absolutely ridiculous. I sent emails to Adult Protection prior their leaving and Kathy Young N. Y. State Senator’s office. ( I got a letter 3 days after they left ) that they would help along with the assisted living facility to keep my parents safe. The whole ordeal could have been avoided had jobs been done. They worried about my parents rights and didn’t care about “They’re safety”

    Kathy shared a story:

    Kathleen shared a story:

    4 years ago, I received a phone call from my brother saying my Dad was in the hospital. We weren’t sure what had happened, only that he had fallen and Glynna (my stepmother) could not get him up. As the story unfolded, I quickly learned that the medics were uncertain how long he had laid there, because his blood had pooled on one side of his body, he was found with feces caked on his arms, and the house was in deplorable conditions. My dad had severely infected bed sores, as well. My Dad’s wife, Glynna does not work, and was with him the entire time. When I arrived at the hospital, Glynna seemed to be standoffish, and didn’t want to speak to me about his condition or what happened. I had no idea why, we had never had any issues prior to this. She became hostile toward me, and actually had me removed by security at the hospital, it was unbelievable! I immediately filed for Guardianship. She filed shortly after me, and gifted the house to herself that was my father’s home many years before they had married. My brother, Greg, who is bipolar and taking no meds, and has a criminal record, and could not ascertain guardianship status become threatening and volatile toward my family, and our mother. I was trespassed from my Dad’s house for over a year. The entire time, my Dad’s diseases are progressing, he has Dementia & Parkinson Disease. Finally, after going to court, and enduring all the ugliness and lies told about me, I told my attorney that it would be best if a third party was appointed as a guardian. I was emotionally and mentally exhausted, it had consumed me. During the time that the guardian has taken over, my Dad’s wife and my brother have made it difficult for me to see him. His wife never leaves the room when I come to visit. My brother tries to intimidate me when he knows I am coming over by showing up. I have gotten to see my Dad, but it is by far, under good circumstances. As of late, my father is declining in his health. He is completely bedridden and they have stopped therapy altogether. They have brought aides in Monday through Fridays from 12-3. Apparently, his wife is unable to lift him by herself. Back in January, my daughter went to visit, and Glynna and my brother stood at the door and wouldn’t let us in. My brother became verbally threatening to my 19 year old daughter, by calling her names. During the process of me filing for guardianship, my brother threatened my family and mother to the point that I had to file a restraining order against him. So, my daughter called the police, and Glynna called the guardian. The guardian was furious that we called the police. She was clearly angry with me on the phone about it. I explained to her that my brother is unpredictable being bipolar, and he was threatening to us. So, a few days later, I receive an email from the guardian stating that I am no longer allowed over when my dad has aides or therapists there. Also, I am only allowed to have 3 unannounced visits a year, and then the rest of the time I am to schedule visits with his wife. I am beside myself with all of this craziness. Also, did I mention the guardian is now doing Glynna’s bills for her? No conflict of interest there!! As a single parent, I had to take out a personal loan to pay for the guardianship case. I feel as though, the guardian has only her best interest at hand and not my father’s. I asked the Guardian if my brother had the same stipulations as I did, and she refused to discuss it with me. I feel she is very biased toward Glynna and is treating me as the enemy, and that because it became public record that the police were there because of a matter involving the guardianship, which makes the guardian appear incompetent, is why I am no longer allowed to come at any time. Please help me in this matter!! I will do whatever it takes to help you file the visitation bill here in Ohio.

    Emotionally Exhausted

    Marie shared a story:

    Please read comment I posted in facebook…CORA MAE FUBDERBURK

    Stephan shared a story:

    A FIGHT AGAINST THE INJUSTICE OF THE FLORIDA COURT SYSTEM
    A fight against injustice
    Showstarksupport.wordpress.com
    Love lasts forever. There is nothing more powerful than the bonds of true love and true happiness between two people. Nothing at all that trumps a lifetime spent together.

    IMG_0943.JPGNothing at all, except the judicial system. At the end of your life, when you are in your final moments, and you are barred from spending your last breath with your loved one, only then do we truly realize the extent of this broken system.

    My name is Stephan Showstark, and I would like to raise funds to fight the injustices I faced when I was prohibited from seeing my wife before she passed away.

    My story is a tragic and immoral disruption to the marital bliss shared by two elderly people. The 21-year relationship blossomed over time to include Susan, my daughter and three children from Susan’s previous marriages. The children had been living with their biological father until their lives were damaged to such an extent that they fled to be with their mother and me. My only daughter was included in this extended family. Our blended family laughed together, cried together, and endured the many heartaches and fears as well as the many joys and moments of triumph associated with living in a family environment. Susan, my daughter and Susan’s children were the love of my life and the focus of my world.

    I raised Susan’s children as though they were my own, affording them every advantage, including college education, travel, the best schools and a home. Sadly, I was met in return with a manipulative legal scheme to break up my marriage and profit from its demise at a time in our lives when we were most vulnerable.

    img_1048Susan was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor in Gainesville, where we lived. That diagnosis led to countless treatments and research, and a total of three surgeries over one year, including numerous medications, chemotherapy and surgery. I explored every possible means of securing her well-being worldwide and hopeful cure, never leaving her side. Her condition created paranoia, confusion, and other ill effects for that year.

    On November 26, 2013, one of my stepchildren secreted my wife from me when she was having post-op suture removal following her third surgery in Miami. I was waiting for Susan in a doctor’s office while she went downstairs for a CAT Scan when a nurse informed me that they no longer had knowledge of Susan’s whereabouts. My search for her resulted in my learning she was with my stepdaughter. I returned to my hotel to pack and join them when my stepdaughter called to say she owed me no explanation for what was happening with Susan and hung up on me. They had taken her from the hospital under false pretenses, had Susan change her will and give them power of attorney, and then offered to let me hold her hand only in exchange for money. I was never allowed to see Susan, my wife and partner of 21 years, ever again. Rather I was divorced from her in 31 days after she was taken (and 66 days after her last surgery to relieve paralysis) at a hearing that included no medical testimony nor myself being present. Susan was testifying incoherently, not answering questions and was often having to be directed back to the original question by her attorney and the judge. On May 27, she called me twice, twenty minutes apart. I called her back in between the two calls to tell her that I missed her, I loved her, and I wanted to be with her. She sounded as though someone had a hand over her mouth when speaking into the phone. I immediately called the administrative offices at the facility she was staying at and begged them to send a nurse to her room to check on her. The administrator told me that he couldn’t do that because it was a “legal matter.” If someone is in need of help, they should receive it, to which this man repeatedly ignored my request and Susan’s needs, furthering the scheme to separate me from my wife. This is my last memory of her, as I did not speak to her or see her again before she passed away on June 9, 2014.

    I have been in the court system for over two years now, filing appeals on the fact that having this court hearing in Miami was unjust and illegal. We live in Gainesville, Florida, which is where the hearing should have taken place (not that there should have been a hearing in the first place). My guardianship attorney received an extortion e-mail that said if I drop the appeals they will find a way that I could be with my wife in Hospice. This exploited Susan’s mental incapacity for financial gain.

    Lies given to the Gainesville Judge, hiding of the new Power of Attorney my wife signed from courts that had not been addressed by the Judiciary, the Judge’s refusal to recuse himself, laws not being carried out and adhered to. Also the Judge in Miami stating, “Oh I know brain cancer,” to my wife’s attorney and step children. Susan had a medical episode the day before the divorce. She could not swallow and was paralyzed and appeared in court that day in a wheelchair with an aide. These are the injustices I wish to fight.

    The divorce gave my wife’s children the entire inheritance of her will. They robbed me of the last few montimg_0595hs of my wife’s life to make a profit off of her death.

    I am both heartbroken and enraged by what has happened. My wife died shortly thereafter, never comprehending the tireless efforts I made to get back to her.

    I hope to prevent this kind of injustice from occurring to families in the future through judicial policy reform.

    My goal is to reform the judicial system to require judges to be ethical, lawful and just. These individuals are responsible for you and your families’ futures when you enter the courtroom, and many judges abuse this power. I will lobby for a new department to be created which will be responsible for monitoring judicial practice. This department will be held accountable for the manner in which judges conduct themselves. You will be able to contact this department with complaints of a particular judge or lawyer, and the department will then raise an investigation as to their conduct. The department will employ a regulatory force to monitor judges during trials, specifically monitoring the inconsistencies of the judiciary to encourage lawful behavior.

    I in no way believe that the capricious judge or lack of judicial curiosity of a lawyer is the rule, but rather the exception. However, it is necessary to adopt some way to report and right an unjust situation should it ever arise.

    To accomplish these goals, I am raising money to fund fees, consultants and other expenses that come along with this kind of legal campaign. Please consider donating to my campaign. Additionally, if you or any of your connections have any experience moving legislation through the system, these contacts would help many people and I would be very interested in hearing from you.

    I in no way wish to profit from your donations, but will use the money to fight these injustices from occurring in the future. This type of inconsistency by judges and exploitation by the judicial system must be stopped. Please join me in my efforts to bring an end to the abuse of people from the lawyers and Judges of the Family Courts. Many people have been abused by opportunistic members of this group. Together we can stop them.

    Please click here to help me raise funds to fight this injustice I faced

    Hayes shared a story:

    Here is what the nursing home and guardian did to my mother: http://blackhawkgroup-midwest.blogspot.com/

    Clara shared a story:

    I’m the youngest of 7. My oldest brother died in 1981. My mother died May 1, 1992. She left her insurance to me. But it wasn’t enough too cover everything. My siblings and I put in the rest and I signed st son n over her life insurance at the funeral home. Mom had picked out the cemetery, plot and her stone. Well, in 2007 my oldest sister died. Her oldest son, (my nephew) made arrangements. The day of the funeral as I drove up to the cemetery, I realize that my mom’s graveside has not only been disturbed but they were pulling my mom out of her already resting graveside. I felt my heart drop. Well under my nephews orders they moved my mother to where my sister was being buried because they wanted them buried together. I was sad, furious, angry and emotionally grieve stricken. I didn’t say anything to y sisters adult children. But felt that it was wrong of them to disturb my mother’s grave especially without our permission. And the owners of the cemetery, how dare them move anyone without the next of kins permission! I don’t know the law on this but I feel that we deserve at the very least an apology. Can anyone just say "I want this person moved (who is already resting) without the permission of the next of kin? Can I do something about this?
    Sorry Mom.
    Clara

    Mickie shared a story:

    North Carolinians, please help!! There is a visitation bill that has been drafted. It’s House Bill 539. This is a great step forward, but the bill is limited. It only covers elderly adults who have either been legally deemed incompetent or have been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or dementia. I feel it needs to include any incapacitated elderly adult who is being cared for by a caregiver. In my case, my mother-in-law had a stroke. She has not been found incompetent but is under her husband’s constant care due to the profound effects the stroke had to her mobility and speech. Even though she can make her own decisions, he is doing so for her and is picking and choosing who she can spend time with or speak with on the phone. Unfortunately, her son and me are people he’s decided she doesn’t need to be in contact with. I have left voice mail messages with the primary sponsors of this bill and have emailed the NC Aging Committee members who helped draft the bill. Please, if you can, call, email or write the members of the NC Aging Committee to let them know that no elderly adult under supervision by a caregiver should be left out of this bill. We want all our elderly loved ones to have the right to spend time with their relatives. Thank you.

    Lisa shared a story:

    Anne Shea, Elder Abuse of WWII, Holocust Survivor

    My mother, Anne Shea, is a 94 year old survivor of the Holocaust and part of the Nazi resistance, saving many Jewish children from being put on a train to a death camp.

    In the 40’s, my mother was one of a very women who had college degrees. Her family were teachers and she followed in the “family business”. One day the Nazis came and took her roster of children.  She taught all grades. The Nazi’s called out all of the Jewish students and carted them off never to be heard from again. The same with their families.  Anne Mack ,a devout Catholic, on her own, went to the parish priest at the Catholic Church.  She convinced the priest to give baptismal certification to all her Jewish children. She changed their names and the priest gave her the documentation.  Anne Mack did this alone. There were no others to assist her in saving the Jews from the Nazis. She was a young teacher and understood what would happen if she was caught. 

    At the time, the American’s occupied the Sudetenland, her home.  Americans turned over the territory to the Russians.  The Nazi’s caught on to what she was doing and came after her. She hid in homes, attics and, barns, trying to get a message from behind enemy lines to an American soldier that she fell in love with.   Her mother was almost beaten to death when she would not inform on where my mother was. My grandmother suffered from the trauma for the rest of her life. After a week, Private Gerry Shea, got the message and he planned on his own to rescue her. They agreed to meet in the cemetery where my Dad first met her.  He took a US Jeep, bribed the Russians with a carton of cigarettes, and went to pick her up. She hid in the jeep with only a blanket covering her. They made it safely to the US Occupied Germany by bribing the enemy with a bottle of whiskey. The experience with the Nazi’s left Mom traumatizes for a long time and she becomes extremely confused and fearful when she feel threatened.
     
    Now we are in 2010. My Dad died in 1998 after a stroke and my s husband and soul mate died on our 23rd wedding anniversary in 2005 of pancreatic cancer. Mom had a several mini strokes where she could not talk or respond to us. She was deeply depressed.  I saw the same behavior in my Dad and grandmother before they had their major strokes. My son visited her at least twice a month while I dealt with my own profound grief. After celebrating my birthday in 2010, I noticed Mom was not dressed up like she would have been.  I attempted to call her for two weeks and eventually learned from a security guard at her Riderwood apartment that she had suffered a stroke.  Riderwood demanded that my mother needed a guardian, which I assumed would be me, an only child. Instead, the judge appointed at least four attorneys to attend to my Mom. At this time I was visiting her daily.  We want back to court and my atty, Ron Schwartz, proposed that our family attorney, Catherine Koester, be appointed guardian for six months, subject to my agreement, while I got Mom the care she needed. Then he said Catherine Koester would transfer the guardianship to me at that time.  

    Catherine Koester then moved my mother from Riderwood to Autumn Meadows because my mother was not getting adequate medical care. We became concerned when we learned that Catherine Koester had given instructions to the staff to disregard the medical issues I saw.  While in Autumn Meadows, her toes were ingrown, each nail was bloody and with so much fungus they looked worse than the example on the Mayo Clinic’s webpage.  It took them many weeks to get a doctor out to see her.  Mom could not walk because of the pain in her feet.  All this time, I asked when Catherine Koester would transfer the guardianship to me as we had agreed to… She never did so. Mom’s legal bills could have been as high as $100k by this time.
     
    On another occasion, Val, the house manager at Autumn Meadows, determined my mother had a UTI and needed antibiotics. Val went to the doctor she knew and got prescription medications.  Val was not a doctor. Both Catherine Koester and Val has the records for my mother’s medications. My mother is allergic to Cipro and ended up into the emergency room. Someone didn’t check my mother’s information that they has on file. NO ONE called me to tell me she was there in emergency. It’s a 15 min drive to the hospital. Lynn, Catherine Koester’s caseworker called me after 6 hrs to tell me. When I arrived with my husband, my mother was crying and screaming “thank you for coming Lisa”.  I asked Lynn, the caseworker, about the medical aspects of this allergic reaction and she threw her hands up and left. Not just the room, but the hospital. Luckily my husband and I were there until the doctor hospitalized her overnight because of the severity of the reaction. We left around 11am ??? and came back at 6am to find no caseworker. No one was there for Mom.  The doctor told us it took 24 hrs to be sure of a UTI, not 2 hrs. We drove her back to Autumn Meadows in the afternoon.  I was told by the AM staff that they were sick of  the Guardian’s interference between Anne and her family.  My mother was progressively denied the visit she needed. She felt isolated. She sat at the door waiting for my visits.  The facility thought Mom needed more than they could give her.  There were problems with dressing Mom and Mom looking for help.
     
    The Guardian then moved my mother from Autumn Meadow to Riva Terrace.  It was a dimly light house with no activities.  I looked them up on a Place for Mom and saw they claimed that they had a swimming pool, beauty salon, and a variety of meals. This was a lie. There was nothing there to do but watch Rt 2 traffic or watch 1 TV for 5 residents.  Time after time the caregiver said they were unhappy working with the guardian and her caseworker . They did not like denying visitors since Mrs. Shea got visited by only 3 family members whenever I brought attention to a medical issue or a dangerous situation, the guardian would cut my mother off all visits.  It was like torture for my mother to be so severely restricted. I noted AA County has sign in each home with numbers to call if you have any concern about a resident and I used that number.  My Mother was suffering from elder abuse by isolation.  The number the exact time and length of visits were progressively restricted. 
     
    When we first visited, we were required to take her out of the home, even though she could not walk and had no walker the 3 of us mentioned. When my son asked for a different schedule, since he was working, the Guardian would not change the 11am-3pm time. Normal people are at work during the 11-3 time frame. It came down that he loved his grandmother more and lost his job.  Each time the Guardian was displeased, my mother’s visits we further reduced or suspended. Years before she left, the caregiver told me the owner was very sorry she took my Mom because Catherine and Lynn were making so changes to visitation permission.
     
    In July 2017, I brought in my service dog as I had for years. She was always excited to spend time with Schatzi.  The caregiver started screaming at everyone including my mother who was holding the leash.  The caregiver told us there is no law for service dogs and she was throwing us out.  I called my son to come over as I was hoping to divert Mom’s attention while we left with the dog. The caregiver had no understanding of service dogs, ADA etc. We have tapes from July 3 & 4.
     
    Since July 3, 2016 I have only seen my Mom twice. Once was in September for her birthday, which we were required to meet on the home’s driveway for one hour.  The last time was on a cold Christmas day on the driveway. Between those two visits she lost so much weight and was talking only in German. The guardian allows Mom no calls or visits. Since mom speaks German, she has no interaction.

     
    Jan. 25, 2011
    From  Lisa Shea
    To: Ben Woolery Esq
     
    My Mother wants help and visits from Dillon and myself. She cries when we have to leave or can not make it the next day. She feels so isolated
     
    personnel. Visits cut back by guardian
     
     
    May 23
    Mrs. Shea abused when she said she did not want to go to the doctor with a stranger. It brought back nightmares from WWII. People grabbing at her trying to pull her out of home. Staff threatened her by telling Mrs Shea that the staff would lose their jobs if she did not comply. She was taken crying from the home. An unauthorized staffer drove Mrs. Shea in her person car without proper insurance or authorization
    .
    June 2012
    Mrs Shea’s toe nails are so bad she cant walk. . Took photos.  She still cannot walk without pain and her feet are swollen.
     
     
    July 2011
    From Ms. Mattison
    To: CMK Guardian
     
    Requesting info on why Mrs. Shea was given a prescription she was allergic to;

    Why did the guardians appointed backup, Lynn Carr deserted Mrs. Shea at hospital’s emergency room after 6 hours. Ms Shea and husband were at the emergency room as soon as they were called 6 hrs into emergency
    Why did it take 6 hrs to call Anne’s daughter?
    Lynn left prior to the Dr decision that Mrs. Shea was ill enough to stay overnight. Dr said UTI test took 24 hours and Mrs. Shea did not have one
    On another day, Lisa was called to the home to help Mrs.Shea put on her pjs because of staff behavior. They called her to come over. Mrs Shea felt so depressed and isolated. Toenails still neglected impacting her ability to walk any where
     
    Oct 2012
     From Ron Dolinsky
    To Esq Paula Mattson and Lisa daughter (Lisa’s atty)
     
    Family’s concerned is that Ben does not have the pertinent medical information, such as but limited to:
    Anne Shea’s teeth (3-4) being pulled and given no RX pain medications. I had 2 pulled and the pain lasted 5 day on prescription medications

    Ms. Shea being left by the caseworker Lynn in the AAMC emergency room.  She felt deserted and scared. Mrs. Shea was isolated in a bed in the ER not understanding what was going on until I could translate. She begged me to take her home with me
    I was called by the case worker after 6 hours after incident.
    Casework walked out of emergency room and left the hospital. Ms Shea and husband stayed with Mrs. Shea until she was settled in a room.

    The Dr hospitalized her overnight because she had a fever.
    No ride home from the hospital were made by the guardian. Ms Shea went back to hospital to return Mom to Autumn Meadows
    Her crippling feet issues from ingrown toenails (10), fungus and blood under the nails still not addressed
     
    Sept 2012
     
    Autumn Meadows staff, Val went though Mom’s drawers and stole a sealed envelope for Atty Woolery.  Val also stole several cokes for Mrs Shea. Prior to taking Anne to lunch Lisa noticed a wet stop on Anne’s pants.  Renee said loudly in a packed a living room.” Annie do you need to change your diaper? Mrs. Shea got very upset over the lack of dignity
     
    To Shea
    From My Atty
    Guardians Response to my question about receiving pending matters was “I don’t know” (guardian.)
    ‘”I think she is no longer cooperating with me”
    “Guardian went over the line in a filing she made violating confedntial information”
     
    Aug 2012 toe nails finally trimmed
    Guardian expected problems with getting answers for Ms Shea’s health questions. Ms Shea was cut off whenever she asked Dr a question by CMK’s aide. Renee and Val told daughter Mother couldn’t’t go out until toes had been trimmed. They were trimmed and Mrs. Shea could finally walk out for lunch. Mrs. Shea felt threatened by the 2 aides and their screaming not to take Mrs. Shea out where she wanted to go . Lisa took her mother out to lunch.  Owner Ms Masters is not restricting staff communication to Ms. Shea and family.
     
    Aug 2012
    The owner agreed staff could answer my questions. She is going to facility to talk to her staff.  Any questions go to Ms Masters who will tell Ms. Shea. Anne is very upset and worried they will take her away like Hitler tried to
     
    Sept 6, 2012
    Atty Schwartz to Ms Masters owner of facility. Spoke to her no problem few weeks earlier. Guardian was now involved and they did not want to deal with guardian drama
    Oct 2012
    Oct 3 I went to Autumn Meadows and guardian moved my MOM out.  I had no idea on my birthday where she was. Guardian cuts off visits to the family. Based on an issue I talked to management about. Mom just sat in a chair all day
     
    Aug 28 2012

    March 1, Riderwood refused to let Mom eat lunch at the complex. An aide open the car door while I was backing up. Mom almost fell out of the seat but I had her belted in. Beltsville Police talked to Anne and wrote up a report that she wanted to leave Riderwood.  Riderwood did not get an EO to return my Mom
     
    Dr Schoor reviewed Mom and said Anne retained sufficient to pick her guardian who was her daughter. Dr Schoor filled out the mandated State certificate which indicated Anne had suffice capacity to consent to whom she wanted ad guardian.
     
    Anne went to
    guardians office to sign a will and a power of attorney form. How could
    guardian draw up these legal mandates if Mom couldn’t make her own decisions? I was the authorized guardian back up and had DPOA
     
    Guardian continues to allow no visitation despite Mrs Sheas isolated from family and friends.
     
    Nov 19, 2012
     
    Filed complaint for elder abuse
    My Atty agrees that guardian filings went over the line when she repeated in her filing that I was disabled by a brain injury.
     
     
    April 2013
    guardian denies any visitation to Mrs Shea by anyone.. I got thrown out by Lynn on Thursday when we were reading geman book together in Mom’s room
     
    Through the last 6+ years we have had visitation dangled before our eyes like extortion.  Back  and forth and the only one who suffers most is Mom.  Her screams of crying and screaming for us to comeback continue as we walk outside.
     
     
    July 2016
    I bring my service dog as I had for the previous 2 years. Mom think its her dog. The caregiver blow up and said there are no laws for service dogs. We quickly tried to get the leash from Mom. The only screaming was from the caregiver which we have on tape.  Next day my son Dillon visited (29) and the caregiver tormented him regarding his Omi on tape. I complained to the county about them taking nude photo of my Mom and showed it to me. My visits were terminated and to this time July to April 2017 I have had 2 1 hr visits with my Mom in the cold on the homes driveway. She loves seeing my dog because she thinks it her Schatzi.  My mother begged me to come see her but I said guardian wouldn’t allow it. All the calls revolved how scared she was and couldn’t manage the loneness because no one spoke german got a few phone calls but then the home REFUSED to answer the line during my calling time.

     
    I now have a granddaughter who my Mom always hope to have. Now we have no idea which hole they put Mom in and if they too take naked photos of the residents. We just want to see our Mom before she dies. I was told by the caregiver that would be the next time I would see her DEAD.
     
    I have spent all my savings about 60k and have no visit. The guardian wont let my 30 yo son visit with his daughter. He has done nothing as has my hubby who she loved.
     
    My Mothers only blood relative is Dr.Gerhard Mack in Germany. He has asked that call and visits be implement immediately since he would call his last living relative
     
    To this date I do not know if my Mother is still alive and the religious customs we have done for 100’s of years have not been implemented.

    I told my Dad in 97 I would always look out for Mom. What a mess. We tried mediation but CMK left after 5 minutes.

    Kelli shared a story:

    I to make a challenge. This is to all of the friends of Kasem Cares Foundation, who make and sell Homemade items like Soap’s, Salsa’s, Jelly’s, Candles or who grow Vegetables and sell them at your local Farmer’s Market, or from your Website or if you have a small business that you sell your Homemade or Home Grown products from your home.

    I Challenge you to donate a percentage of each jar of your canned goodies you make, each bar of soap, each candle, all vegetables/fruits you sell or if you make and sell pieces of art at your local Farmer’s Market, please donate a percentage to Kasem Cares Foundation.

    Farmer’s Markets are becoming more and more popular. I am donating 50 Cents from each Pint of my Homemade Pickles I sell at my local Farmer’s Market and from Facebook orders and customer’s I have made throughout the years. I know that doesn’t seem like very much, but if all of us who are ‘Crafty’ and make money from selling our arts and goods, banded together, we could all make a difference.

    Kasem Cares Foundation is an AMAZING team who is making a HUGE presence and a change in our Country, State by State for our Elders and Disabled who are being Abused. They are fighting for us at the State/National level and they are WINNING!!! BUT, it takes money for them to fly across the country and to stay in Hotels for endless nights away from their loved ones. And believe me when I tell you, they don’t choose the most extravagant Hotels and live off of Room Service. These ladies and a couple of gentlemen have been using their own money to pay for the Hotels and Airplane tickets. I have been there when there are three different people calling three of the lowest priced Airline ticket finder companies trying to get people back home. Tickets aren’t bought in advance because they never know when a Bill will pass. It could take a week, or it could take a day like it did in Arkansas. They can’t order their return flights ahead of time. The places like Priceline and Cheap Seats don’t give refunds if you need to change your return airplane ticket. So they wait to get a return ticket. They deal with a lot of unseen red tags on their trips to get Bills passed for our friends and families.

    Please, let’s get all Artesians and HomeGoods Crafters who make a living selling your art/goods, to donate a percentage to this AMAZING Foundation! Thanks So Much. Kelli Mims

    Kim shared a story:

    I was denied access to my bedridden mother by my sibling. Mom had dementia. She had a broken femur that had left her too weak to move around. She was in end stage heart failure. My sibling wanted me to sign over my part of dad’s insurance money in return for seeing mom. I refused. What would she have demanded next? She had already removed mom’s phone and taken her glasses. She had the power of attorney and was made sole heir and administrator. She used the power of attorney to sell the home and move. I didn’t know where. She took my mom and I was never given a chance to see her again. No one would help me. Not Adult Protective Services, not the police. This all happened in Bedford, Virginia.
    Is there a push in Virginia yet? I don’t want this to happen to anyone else.

    Kim shared a story:

    I was denied access to my bedridden mother by my sibling. Mom had dementia. She had a broken femur that had left her too weak to move around. She was in end stage heart failure. My sibling wanted me to sign over my part of dad’s insurance money in return for seeing mom. I refused. What would she have demanded next? She had already removed mom’s phone and taken her glasses. She had the power of attorney and was made sole heir and administrator. She used the power of attorney to sell the home and move. I didn’t know where. She took my mom and I was never given a chance to see her again. No one would help me. Not Adult Protective Services, not the police. This all happened in Bedford, Virginia.
    Is there a push in Virginia yet? I don’t want this to happen to anyone else.

    Fred shared a story:

    My mother is currently a victim of a corrupt guardianship in Nassau County started by my sadistic crooked older brother

    Karen shared a story:

    90 year old Rita Cole forced guardianship by her ex elder care attorney after she fired him! The judge allowed him to be temporary guardian with no doctor report! The attorney came to my house with 2 Richmond Rhode Island cops! He took my aunt against her will locked her up in memory care drugged her and stole all her money 117G plus 2G a month pension and SS and is now petioning the court to sell her condo and assests! She is now dressed in rags and is missing 4 front teeth! The attorney listed Rita Cole as severly demented with behavior problems so she can be locked up drugged and controlled as he steals her money!

    Sean shared a story:

    Can you advise if there is legislation pending in New Jersey to address this issue?
    Thanks,
    Sean Dalton
    Gloucester County Prosecutor

    Donald shared a story:

    They didn’t get any information. < Spokesperson for Hollywood Presbyterian Hospital
    Quote given to Channel 7 Eyewitness News Los Angeles >> They didn’t get “any” information, they got “all” the information. PHI cites/fines are in the millions. $$$$ $$$ $$ $
    Quote of question asked Mary Chester, District Manager, Riverside District, "You mean you did not cite them for PHI?

    http://www.healthcaredive.com/news/why-cybersecurity-should-be-important-to-hospitals/436879/ excerpt 02/27/17 from article:
    Two more attacks followed a month later at other California hospitals, Chino Valley Medical Center in Chino and Desert Valley Hospital in Victorville, both operated by Prime Healthcare Services.

    Really?? Prime Healthcare?? You mean owner of La Palma Hospital? (Staff was told "higher ups wanted me discharged that day November 7, 2015.) To Lucille Room and Board, 12671 Lucille Ave, Garden Grove. Turned out business was owned and run by 2 employees of the Orange County Jail Health Department.
    Garden Grove Hospital 11/27/16, same Prime Healthcare owner, zipped me off to Pacific Haven, 12072 Trask Ave, Garden Grove. Imagine that… Oh, taken to hospital after eating donuts given me by tenant then suffering heart attack. Are Healthcare and RICO the same? (synonymous)
    Oh. Mary Chester works for the California Department of Public Health.
    It’s all just a “coincidence”.

    Lisa shared a story:

    My Mom is 94. Her name is Anne M Shea. She saved countless Jewish children only to land in Maryland denied visits or calls from her family of 3. Attorneys have totally isolated her and then want to be paid thousands just to isolate her. She now speaks German and has no one to talk to. Mom has a great grandaughter but she is dying so she will never meet her. She sits in a small room at the Riva Terrace V home in Arnold Md

    Please, she is the last parent I have and I am an only child