Abby Dozier's activity stream

  • commented on Share Your Story 2018-10-11 23:27:52 -0700
    I would like discount code to watch.

    My husband has a degenerative brain disease (MSA). He was taken out of Florida 7 months ago. I don’t know who took him. He’s with a brother in Appalachia. A brother he’s only seen 3 times in 50 years, whom I’ve only met once. He has other wards isolated on his property along with my husband. They haven’t been allowed to talk to their family either. The property is mountainous, remote, fenced, hidden by a hedge. They have guns, alarms, and dogs. I’m scared to go there and have been threatened.
    The brother is in the VA system looking for benefits. He has canceled the health insurance I had in place. He’s already gotten his SS, and probably the missing money ($80,000 from our bank), and probably the life insurance we paid 30 years, and the brother is furious he can’t get at the rest of our assets (so far). He wants a divorce. My husband & I don’t. The brother wants control of the assets. The GAL (guardian ad litem) told the court a divorce had been started 7 months ago. It hadn’t. My husband agrees with everything they say. He can barely talk.

    I can’t get law enforcement to act. Talked to FBI and police in two states and Adult Protective Services. My lawyer abandoned me. I don’t know why. She’s running for political office. Maybe that consumed her. She turned hostile after the 1st hearing where (video of court) they all seem tacitly to agree to wait for the KY guardianship law to change in 6 months when jury trial will no longer be required to determine competence and he’s resident. A three day process turns into six months. My husband is now resident of Kentucky. The judge rules from the bench, “he’s competent.” The judge does a double take, my husband is so confused in court (obviously not competent), and directs speech to brother. It was arranged that my son & I would get to speak to court on phone from Florida but we were never called. I just wanted my husband to hear my voice. Can’t speak to him or get near him for 7 months. No one can for 6 months. I know he has no phone. His message box is full 6 months. No court order, or restraining order, or guardianship. No legal reason. Just brother’s power in this mountain town. My lawyer says, “I can’t make him talk to you.” I said, what about our son? I know he wants to see him. She says, “Maybe he can come 5 minutes before court and have coffee!” He went up with old friend instead. He flew & drove 3 hours and they were told by brother, “You can’t talk about me or court.” Husband was not allowed to leave even though he had wanted to. No legal reason. He says, “brother says it is for my protection.” From what? He’s prisoner.

    When he thought son might not come he cries. When brother throws him out husband tries to protest and tries to stand and hug son.

    Friend and son make small talk 2 hours. Finally friend says, “Do you understand they want guardianship?” My husband says, “Yes, the judge says it’s revocable since I’m in my right mind, all I have to do it pick up a phone and cancel.” What phone? My husband is a cynical person. He’d never believe this. Friend says, “I never heard of revocable.” Brother bursts in screaming, “Weren’t you told not to talk about that?” He’s obviously eavesdropping from the main house. He says awful things about me repeatedly that are lies. My husband tries to object. He says “They did nothing wrong. They don’t have to leave.” He’s scared and then agrees with everything his brother says even though my husband knows it is a lie. He says, “Yes sir,” repeatedly. He’s not one to say yes sir. He’s called his childhood nickname. He has no identity anymore. They are thrown out. So shook up they are lost in mountains 2 hours. Friend taped this. Its legal. The eavesdropping the brother does is not legal. I send it to my lawyer and ask her 3 times can she show it to court “team.” She ignores me. Friend & son send sworn affidavits to the court (advised by Guardianship Association – not by my lawyer who says nothing except “nothing is stopping you.”)

    My husband is spied on. He cannot tell anyone honestly what is going on. I see in record; the nurses who have been taking care of him complain about it. The home nursing agency tells brother it is our policy not to tape our employees. You have to stop. The brother is doing this not to monitor care, he is doing it to be certain my husband does not disclose anything to outsiders. The psychiatrist from the VA comes to the house to interview my husband. After, he goes to the main house and talks to brother (for 2 hours!). He says brother says he has heard everything they talked about on the monitor. The doctor does not appear to be distressed by this. Brother listens to everything. My husband is aware and acts accordingly.

    He says things that make no sense such as he eats more at his brother’s than he did at home – but he’s lost 15 pounds since there. I told the brother early on – he needs his food cut. He cannot coordinate the movements or have strength to cut. His brother says, “He don’t need his food cut. We put it on a tray in front of him and he eats.” I asked how is he. He said, “He gets his food.” Like a dog. My friend said he shook so badly he dropped food. He asked her to pick it up saying, “brother will get mad.” They gave him a coke in a glass. He never drinks soda. He’s diabetic. He can’t hold a glass. I used a cup with a lid and big handle. He is dehydrated and cachectic. He ate well here. He says he doesn’t read because he has a cataract, He does not have a cataract. There is no reason to say this except he doesn’t want to reveal he does nothing with his mind all day. His brother is illiterate and has no books. He says he has no pain. Zero. Why would he say that? Because he is afraid of the brother. Yet when they try to measure the bedsores the nurses say it is not possible because he has so much discomfort. He also says things about me. That I told him to leave. I almost fainted when he left. I paced and didn’t sleep for ten days when I didn’t hear from him. I’m in shock, depressed, crying, calling police, FBI, and can’t get near him. He said I didn’t work. I worked full time and paid all the bills and took care of him 24/7. He says I took $700,000 of our money & put it in account where he can’t get it. I do not have that much money! I froze accounts to protect what was left on advice of the bank, lawyers, and police. His brother thinks we have that much money. His brother has told him to say these things. I have a mortgage, leaking house, taxes, insurance, hardly any social security, and had to shut down the business. He knows he took $80,000 and his brother probably has it. He says I talked about murder suicide. I don’t want him to die. I’m depressed he’s dying. I don’t want to die. I’m healthy. He knows I’ve never been near a gun in my life. I’ve been married to him since I’m 22 years old. He is brainwashed. This is how they were able to keep this in KY rather than have it moved to his home in FL. Saying he is afraid of me. We have been married 44 years!

    I wrote to the VA. I don’t want them to know I can see his records (or brother will cut me off) so said I’m writing to all VA’s in the area. They can see the abuse themselves. The brother spies on everything, they already know that. They can see he has bedsores. They see that he is isolated. Unable to move. Kept in a little house away from the main house by himself. How can he not go nuts? How is this not abuse on its face? My lawyer says, “What do you want me to do? APS and police say he’s fine.” Because HE says he’s fine – and he is a prisoner and spied on every minute! What if there was a fire? What does he do all day? Its solitary confinement. I took him out every day here. He was out for hours by himself without me with other people. We went to over 150 medical appointments counting PT. He saw 9 doctors regularly, . Yet they are saying I neglected him and didn’t want him here. I took care of him like a baby by myself. He showered 7-10 times a week, plus I washed him at night. He only gets bathed 3 times a week there by nurses who come in. The brother isn’t going to do any work even though that is how he coerced him to come. Told him I’d put him in a nursing home and he’d take care of him. He has bedsores! The brother tells the VA his incontinence has gotten worse lately. To explain the bedsores. No it hasn’t. It could not get any worse. He’s had no bladder control for two years. He’s been sitting in urine for 7 months. He’s excoriated too.

    Brother (and apparently my husband – who is brainwashed) wanted court guardianship. The judge tells him, “You have POA right? The wife can’t “bother” you ever again.” We’ve been married 44 years! The County Attorney says, “We could all use that.’” All the men in court have a laugh. My husband appears distressed. I later learn he’s sitting there with two bedsores.

    Durable POA covers the brother for all documents he’s already changed (& going forward) such as life insurance.. Why didn’t they get court guardianship? New laws? DOJ now has oversight & jurisdiction with court appointed guardianship. No one in this town is used to scrutiny,. I am outsider protesting, the situation is so bizarre, and I’m talking about AG, FBI, new federal laws, crossing state lines, and other victims in my affidavit, and the judge doesn’t need a hot potato because they can get rid of me in so many other ways in that town. There is NO oversight now & brother can do anything he wants. Brother had signed IRS check, but refused to show me power of attorney. I know he’s had it since 1st day my husband arrived – that would be before I heard from my husband. When I did hear, he sounded like a zombie, drugged out of his mind. I’d like to see the signature.
    I eventually fired my lawyer. Had to get transcripts because she wouldn’t even tell me what happened in hearing. She’s running for office. She’s an “outsider” who wants to be a Kentuckian – so I think she buddied up with them. These people have lived in the region hundreds of years. They are literally all related. The creeks, mines, and cemeteries have their names. They are the sheriffs, judges, lawyers, politicians, business owners, high school principals, mine owners. The brother is illiterate but he’s always with the cousins who take care of him & he does the “dirty work” according to another victimized cousin. I called statewide looking for a new lawyer. They won’t go this far. One said because of the distance and the corruption. The Guardianship Society of KY said “There is no justice in those mountains.” A Florida lawyer said, “I’m from a small town in coal country. Don’t go there. They do anything they want in those towns. “

    My husband never lived there. He spent most of his life in Florida. He was valedictorian, worked in intelligence , had a full scholarship to University , was a journalist 8 years, and had a real estate business for 30 years with me. His brother is illiterate. Worked in nursing homes and lived on disability, moving from trailer to trailer until he “inherited” a house from elderly person he cared for (cousin said he had ward sign deed to him). My husband never told me he had this brother. I learned 10 years after we were married. I met him one time in 44 years. Only talked to him several times. I always said nice things about him. His kids are educated nurses. I sent gifts and letters. I just didn’t know him. Didn’t see him for 30 years but once my husband got sick he was on the phone with him constantly. Probably daily. Influencing him. Telling him I’d put him in a nursing home if he stayed here. Especially after I took his car keys when he had an accident. That’s when he starts taking money from the bank. My husband once got off the phone with his brother and sadly said, “His electric bill is $700. He needs solar.” My house is leaking from a hurricane. When he first got there my husband yelled at me, “You were going to put me in a nursing home!” NO! I was not. He yelled, “You told police I was hallucinating!” NO! I never did. I said I thought he was depressed. The brother was telling him those things, gaslighting him. Coercing him from the start – before he left. He told him he was going to take him to the VA to get stem cell transplant which was a lie. He’s only at the VA after 7 months for benefits.

    I was a nurse. I’ve been married to him since I was practically a kid. I was taking care of him by myself and working full time (mostly at home in business) and wanted to quit working. I would never abandon him. He’s told people I told him to leave. I’ve been obsessed with getting him home.

    The brother had a sad childhood. The mother left when he was 3. The father said he wasn’t his. The step mother abused him. Locked him up in a room and starved him. Beat him. I think he’s doing this to my husband. I think he’s vengeful. I think he’s slow mentally (but has been taught to be cunning by cousins who know the law & money), and I think he’s sadistic. He was sent to live with aunt in KY at age 9 or 10 . Brothers didn’t see each other for 30 years. He said to me, ”He must have been ashamed of me.” “None of this would be happening if you’d been friendlier.” Another time he said, “I never meant anything to you.” I’d heard him say that about his mother before.

    My husband has lost 15 pounds & has two sacral bed sores , a fungal infection, and excoriated skin. Yet he denies pain. That is a hallmark of abuse.
    He told my son, “He can’t take me out and ditch me, like I did.” He gets very upset, starts to cry then yell and says, “Oh man, oh man, I can’t think.” I did not ditch him! I have not been allowed to even speak to him for seven months.

    Court Characters
    The GAL (guardian ad litem) is a friend on Facebook to niece (brother’s daughter). She is friends with 6 of his other family members and the kids are friends. The GAL was partners with the judge before he was a judge. His brother says he took care of the judges father. I asked my lawyer to find out. She said, “I’m sure he’d say. “ The doctor who evaluated him works in small rural clinic with niece (she’s ARNP, may have gotten money from husband). He has 3 malpractice lawsuits and prescribes opioids to 40% of his Medicare patients. He’s from Miami & moves to Appalachia . I object to my lawyer who says, “Yes it’s unethical but what do you want me to do?” I say get impartial doctor and she snaps I am demanding. This region of KY has the highest drug addiction in country (meth / opioids), yet it is the only region that doesn’t have arrests in the national opioid take down this January. I can point them to a doctor right here – treating my husband, but the FBI won’t even answer a phone in KY. I talked to FL FBI who said they had no federal laws. I think they have plenty! The psychologist who evaluates him is “pastoral counselor” yet he has rare brain disease & his FL neurologist said he should see neuropsychologist. She finds him not only mentally competent but physically competent (!) even though he can’t walk, talk, or do anything. I don’t know what the social worker wrote. She brought her report 6 months later to court and found he didn’t need guardian. I objected to reports not being in and told my lawyer I wanted to be prepared but she didn’t care. His new VA community care manager (outside VA care) is a man who was arrested for animal cruelty for starving 2 horses to death. The daughter (ARNP) rides with a police motorcycle club. She is friends with 17 police on Facebook, 2 with her same last name who work at the KY State Police (who threatened me). I’m sure she knows most of the social workers and nurses caring for him and made the arrangements. She had co-POA a day after he got there and was providing his medications. The police in this town are currently being sued by a civil rights firm for framing 3 different people for two different murders! They spent years in jail and the police knew in both cases who the real murderers were. The sheriff was taking drug bribes from one murderer and the police investigator’s relative helped bury one of the bodies! And these are civil trials – not criminal. These same police have threatened me.

    I called KY police and Adult protective services. They said he was okay. He’s not. Adult protective services was hostile to me and said I was withholding money from my husband. My husband was only gone two weeks and had taken $14,000 from the bank in a day. My annual social security is only $9,000. The GAL said in court, “He needed it to buy clothes in his new home.” I do not think my husband convinced APS of this. He can barely talk. I think his brother did. Every conversation with his brother has been about money. The 1st call after the “zombie” call, his brother said, “This old man only came with $3,000. Now what am I supposed to do with that? You know that ain’t nothin. I can’t take care of him with that.” I said, he took a lot more than that ($80,000) – send him back! He acted like we were negotiating nursing care & I hadn’t slept in 10 days and thought my husband was kidnapped.

    KY State Police (Harlan) threatened me. After my son & friend were thrown out and no one could reach my husband for weeks, we called for a wellness check. The officer told me I’d already made 3 false reports and if I called again they would call Florida police and have me charged. They would not go out again. Three of the four “false” reports were asking if anyone had seen my husband in KY yet when I thought he’d been kidnapped. He’d disappeared from Florida, is severely disabled, and no one would pick up a phone and call me and the niece (only one I could reach) denied knowing he was coming. Local police made one of those “false” reports.

    My husband “disappeared” to me on February 7th, 2018. I didn’t hear a word for ten days. I paced, barely slept, and called police. The brother said he didn’t know who he was with but forget it because he was with a friend. After I learned all the money had been taken I thought someone could have robbed him and left him on the side of the road to die. It was ten days of terror. I almost passed out at the bank. The brother started the 1st day – laughed and said it was clever. If I’d been friendlier none of this would be happening. Tried to manipulate me immediately. Said my neighbors were watching me. I was in shock, can’t remember it all but it was sadistic, taunting.
    I was on my way to pick my husband up from an exercise class and he called to say he was going to his brother’s. I called police immediately. Whatever the brother said made police stop their tracer. They thought he was on an end of life fling. His brother is a pathological liar. My husband is in a wheelchair mostly and I kept trying to tell police that made no sense because he was so sick. Police learned someone was taking him out of his exercise class on a regular basis. I learned they were going to the bank and had taken $80,000 over the year. I almost fainted and froze accounts. Tellers did say a woman was with him. I went back to police and told them I thought this was exploitation because my husband was so sick. I still do not know where the money is and still do not know who took my husband to Kentucky. The first call I got (10 days later) my husband sounded like a zombie – drugged out of his mind. He kept repeating, “I need money for my care,” then hung up. He’d taken $14,000 that week and I knew he was with his brother by this time. It felt like extortion. I think it was.
    My husband is not the first person he has done this with. He has another ward now (two others I think according to my husband). A 96 year old woman. He says she has no family. Only us. I found her daughter. She lives nearby and has not been allowed to see her mother in ten years. She misses her terribly. Her own life has been ruined. She says no one sees her mother. She lived with her mother until she was 50. She has a degree in religion and education. It’s not like she’s a crackhead or something. She said the brother told her for months that if she would sign a deed and other papers she could see her mother. When she did not they committed her too (the daughter)! She was found competent but not unscathed emotionally or financially They tormented and teased her, offering her mother as a carrot then refusing her. Ten years later she can barely talk about it. She said her mother fell and broke her hip at the brother’s house. A psychologist was there and left to go to the bathroom. The mother got up and broke her hip. They said she was so upset talking about her daughter she fell. They blamed the daughter who was in another county. She hasn’t been allowed to see her in ten years. She sends cards. They come back. She keeps them. She says no one sees her mother. I asked APS to check on her but they snapped at me they can’t talk to me about it. I don’t think they did. I have told my lawyer, the court and authorities this and given her contact. She said she’d talk to the attorney general. She also said the brother got quite a lot of money and assets from her mother. He has ½ her coal mine shares (cousin got other half). I do not know this as a fact, but she told me all this. I do know her mother lives with the brother and he’d talk about her constantly, Not her, but her money. I don’t know anything about her. Never saw a picture. The one time we visited them, they showed us her room but she was not there the 3 days we were in town. I always wondered where does an 89 year old woman go? The brother told us he asked the daughter to live with him. I asked the daughter. She said, “No. He committed me. Got into my bank before I even knew I was under commitment. I don’t know how he did that “ He told me and a friend he asked me to live with him in a trailer on his property. He did not. I have only talked to him a few times in 44 years. Why would I? I have a house I had no clue my husband would leave or be taken. The daughter also said he befriends old people and gets their money. She and her mother had already been ripped off by a lawyer who got disbarred. It was the 2nd time he’d been disbarred. Ratings on Google show him as one of the best lawyers in the county. He’s deceased now.

    I found another phone for another relative. He’d taken care of her mother in law. She said he didn’t care for her but hired nurses instead and milked her. She said, “You better get a lawyer if you are mixed up with him.” I asked if I came up there would he shoot me. She said, “Probably not,” which wasn’t good enough for me. I already felt terrorized by him. My husband whispered to me when he got there, “I did not change the life insurance.” But the life insurance company has called many times to ask if he changed his address. He hasn’t made a change of address. He still gets mail here. They just want that policy or for me not to see it.

    My husband managed a small trust (not beneficiary). The co-trustee got a letter from a lawyer who said he was my husband’s lawyer asking for all the trust documents. I asked my husband why. He yelled, “NO! I did not call a lawyer!” They did. Fishing. I learned the lawyer was another cousin.

    I keep changing my banks, passwords. Someone went to SS and asked for my information. It was sent to me instead. Someone was in my house. They were upstairs and got all kinds of financial papers. I have artwork missing. I’ve changed locks and am paranoid.

    The brother would tease and laugh sadistically at me and say – “I can’t make him talk to you. I thought you two comminuted better than that.” He did the same thing to the other woman. Teased her sadistically. Kept telling her she could talk to her mother then said, it wasn’t up to him. He said, “You better find out who that woman was. You better pray on it you find out.” He knows who she was because she supposedly deposited him in Knoxville ten days later and the brother took him to KY. If a woman even really took him. Was I supposed to pray to him?

    The brother told me, “Your neighbors are watching. Your friends aren’t really your friends. You know what I’m talkin about. Act like you got some sense.” This was after barely sleeping for 10 days and very creepy. He told the other woman her neighbors said she abused her mother. He gave names of neighbors who didn’t exist. He told me, “I’m going to go to court and tell them you were going to get a gun and have him shoot himself in the head.” He was trying to scare me from court, I didn’t get to talk in court anyway. We weren’t going into the town because of the police and now he’s a resident I don’t want them to serve me with a divorce up there and have jurisdiction over the few assets I have left.

    I think my husband’s been coerced before he ever left. There is no legitimate reason for him not to speak to his family or friends. There is no reason another woman has been kept from her family for ten years by this brother either except for financial reasons. He should not have bedsores. He is wasting in such a cruel way. The isolation is unimaginable. I miss him so much I can’t think about anything else. I cannot get help and he’s going to die.

    Share Your Story

    You’re not alone. Please share your story here so that others can benefit from your experiences. We can help each other heal and can take action together.

    * Please note that we do not share your information with other organizations. We are here to support you and we may reach out to you to learn more about your story. Please let us know immediately via email if you are contacted by groups other than Kasem Cares as a result of your communication with us.  

    * If you'd like to watch the 2017/2018 KasemCares Conference and get a discount code please mention it on the story, e.g. 'I would like to watch the Kasem Cares Conference'.