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You’re not alone. Please share your story here so that others can benefit from your experiences. We can help each other heal and can take action together.

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    Cindy shared a story:

    Our story is about a different kind of elder abuse: emotional and financial abuse through lies and theft. Our dad is a 92 year old decorated WWII veteran married to our mom for 71 years. In August last year we hired an agency to take my dad out a few hours a week to just give him something to do. In December he was hospitalized with the flu. He and my mom were exhausted and needed help once he was home so we hired the same agency for 24/7 care. That’s when the trouble started.

    The agency sent a myriad of people over the course of the next few weeks. No one else except family members were ever in the home. My mom began noticing some of my dad’s things were missing. Over the course of a week his wedding band, a one carat diamond ring, his class ring, his Elks ring, two 18 karat Italian gold chains with medallions, a 1926 gold piece made into a money clip and his wallet all went ‘missing’.

    The office manager convinced us that my mom had ‘hidden’ his things which is common in dementia patients. (According to mom’s doctor she does not have dementia.) Once we turned the house inside out looking for the missing items with no success this same office manger told us she saw my mom looking sneaky with something in her hands when she went into the garage. When mom came out of the garage the office mange said her hands were empty and mom told her she wasn’t doing anything in the garage, now concluding that our 91 year old mother was hiding our dad’s valuables in the garage! By the way, our mom about lost her mind with worry and emotional distress due to these liars.

    We met with the owners and office manager and were told we have no proof that someone from their agency stole the items so we should file a police report. We filed with police and numerous other state, city and county agencies telling the same story over and over. No response from anyone. We searched pawn shops and online sites to no avail.

    Then, a month later we received a phone call from the CHP telling us they found so,e of my dad’s ID on the side of a freeway on ramp, thus proving my mom didn’t ‘hide’ his wallet and therefore it was safe to assume she didn’t hide anything else. We contacted an attorney specializing in elder abuse. He wrote letters to the agencies insurance company…to make a long story shorter, they denied the claim because we had no ‘proof’.

    Since that time we found out about two other instances in which this same agency hired thieves who go away with major theft. In addition, The owner was trying to swindle one of his clients out of millions of dollars which after hiring another attorney that seems to have been thwarted.

    There supposedly are laws in place to protect against this kind of elder abuse and yet, nothing gets done.

    Is there anyone out there who has dealt successful with this type of abuse? If so, who did you contact? What can be done to protect our aging family members?

    Michelle shared a story:

    I need help finding a lawyer who will take a medical malpractice, wrongful death, and/or elder abuse case against Kaiser. I’ve tried all the ones I could find through Google and personal recommendations but have not been able to find anyone yet. The statute of limitations is about to run out so I decided to try one last time.

    The situation is that for seven months Kaiser tortured my Mother. Among many, many other horrors they broke bones and refused to cast them, knocked out teeth, left her lying in feces for hours, caused an anoxic brain injury, lied to us, forced us to attend a death panel to justify why she deserved to live (they told us at 66 and retired she wasn’t “worth the cost” of trying to save her life), and one of their doctors finally killed her by administering a dose of morphine she admitted she knew would be fatal because Mom was “making faces” (something common in people with anoxic brain injuries).

    Unfortunately Mom had Kaiser insurance from the job she retired from and we couldn’t get approval to take her to anyone else. I am a single mother of 2 very young kids and couldn’t afford to take her anywhere on my own. We tried everything – up and down the Kaiser chain of command, every government agency we could, lawyers, mediation… No one would let us/help us move her. My Mom was my best friend, the kindest most wonderful person I’ve ever met, and had only just barely gotten to meet the grandchildren she longed for so badly.

    I spent 7 months and all of my money going to the hospital every day I could, trying to make sure she was as safe as possible and she still suffered so much because I could only be there at most 8 hours a day. My brother was there almost every minute I wasn’t, but… It didn’t matter how much we were there. We couldn’t save her.

    Right now things are rough (for example my kids and I are living in a shelter) because of the emotional and financial drain caused by trying to fight for Mom every day for so long.

    Kaiser destroyed our lives and I so badly don’t want to let them act like it’s business as usual, ruining other lives, killing other people, making money… ike my Mother’s life, and the lives of so many seniors, were worth nothing…

    I was referred to you buy a parent in one of the FB groups I belong to and I was hoping you might be able to refer me to a lawyer who will take my case.

    Thank you!

    Michelle Schwimmer

    Nicole shared a story:

    I wish Kerri kasem and trudy Campbell truvis too kelly rooney Julie l belshe ❤🙌👐❤️✌️🌎 ,family have a fabulous holiday god bless with for kasem care foundation 👍💪♿ end discrimination and harassment domestic violence 💯

    Ronald shared a story:

    I, Ronald Pray, was filed against in court twice as punishment by greedy family members for discovering that my elderly parents were having their assets taken through fraud, being starved through a cornflake diet, being held in seclusion, and being defrauded through a false guardianship.
    I tried to talk to my mother over the telephone, I was told that I was not allowed to speak to her. I called again without identifying myself and was immediately asked for the password since no one could visit or speak to my mother without a password made by Jaqueline Pray. I called several times until I found a sympathetic care worker there who would give me the password. My mother cried like a baby telling me that virtually no one was allowed to visit her while she was held in virtual seclusion and abused by Jaqueline Pray. She begged me to get her out of there and away from Jaqueline Pray. The blame for this false wardship and subsequent abuse of my mother falls squarely on the shoulders of the Seminole County Sheriff and the 18th Circuit Court. I told my brother Justin that he should take guardianship over mother and to get her away from the abuses of Jaqueline Pray.
    The Sheriff’s office in Seminole County enforced a fraudulent guardianship over my mother refusing to witness her rescinding power of attorney vested to Jaqueline Pray declaring that she was under a guardianship held by Jaqueline Pray. The clerk of the court has verified that no such guardianship has ever been vested by the court. The Judge in the Domestic Violence complaint allowed for Jaqueline Pray to file this case on behalf of my parents effectively keeping me from ever talking to or seeing my parents for the rest of their lives. I was forbidden to see or speak to my mother for the last eight years of her life and to visit or speak to my father for the last year or so of his life; nor could I visit them on their deathbeds, nor could I attend their funerals and burials. This judge’s incompetence has caused me an insufferable grief. Also note that the plaintiff and her attorney are culpable in this felony of making this false declaration to the court in regard to guardianship, its conspiracy elements, and all of the accompanying fraud statutes and other lesser crimes included therein. They should have been jailed for this and the judge should have been booted off the bench.
    These guardianships are falsely claimed as a term included and incorporated within the powers of attorney of both parents. An assistant State Attorney in Sanford informed me that power of attorney is not the lawful instrument nor the lawful method in acquiring guardianship over another. Proper forms with personal information must first be filled out and filed with the court in order to have a court review before it is vested; a temporary emergency guardianship may also be acquired. Again, the court clerk has verified that no guardianship was vested to Jaqueline Pray over my parents. The Plaintiff filed a fraudulent guardianship and the State of Florida accepted it as bonafide without ever vetting the claim nor verifying it with the letter of the law. In effect, anyone could hypothetically go through the white pages of the telephone directory in this judge’s jurisdiction; pick out any ‘Tom, Dick, or Mary,’ file a court case on their behalf as wards of a guardianship then file a court case without their consent against another person. My parents were held like children without Rights due to the court’s and the sheriff’s misfeasance, malfeasance, and nonfeasance allowing for the filing of a restraining order against me without their consent, and keeping me from ever seeing them for the rest of their lives. This includes being enjoined from attending their funerals and burials. I am outraged!
    My father has been effected by Alzheimer’s Disease since 1995 yet Jaqueline Pray brought him into one of her attorney’s office in Winter Park, Florida on December 21, 2001 for him to sign a Power of Attorney over him and control of his assets to her. My father couldn’t carry on a conversation; he couldn’t read and comprehend what he was reading; he would use the closet as a commode; he would wear diapers for incontinence; he would wander off where we couldn’t find him having to call law enforcement to locate him; he didn’t even know who I was. This, the domestic violence plaintiff Jaqueline Pray and her attorney, should have been jailed for.
    The State of Florida Attorney General does not want anything to do with all of these abuses I have informed her of. Everything stated here is true and correct and is backed by evidence.
    Regards,

    Ronald Pray

    Nancy shared a story:

    Carrie Ford is a sweet friend of mine and recommended that I post my story on this page. Thank you for your hard work and hopefully something can be done in North Carolina.
    In any other situation, I would NEVER ever post something so sensitive like this but this situation is so egregious that we are in need of assistance.
    I am requesting prayers for our beloved Ken. Tom’s brother Ken, only 56 yrs old, suffered from a major stroke on Sat, June 17th. Tom was informed of his medical condition 4 days later on June 20th through Steph. Steph had an intuition that something was wrong given Melissa’s dodgey facebook posts (Ken’s wife) . Steph then reached out to Melissa who has gorgeous kids of her own (not Ken’s) (They married 2 yrs ago and were contemplating divorce the day before the stroke). Melissa FINALLY came clean and admitted that Kenny Bill was in ICU and that she did not inform Ken’s family of his serious state – which included Kenny’s mother. Steph being an honorable and upstanding human being elected to inform Ken’s bother of his serious medical condition. Thank you and love you so much Steph, we are forever grateful. ❤️❤️
    Tom then drove 7 terrifying hrs to be by his brother’s side. Tom was finally able to see his brother’s beautiful face which lit up when he recognized his little brother. After an exhange of “I love you” between brothers, Ken immediatly asked for his mom. ❤️ Note: EVERY parent should be informed about a threat to their child’s life, sadly Rosa was NOT. 😭 Thiis is compounded by the fact that Rosa lost a son – Pete Overfield and he died at 56 – Tom lost his big brother.
    According to hospital staff, I am sorry to report that Melissa has actively blocked Ken’s mother and brother from receiving further information about Ken’s health and she has blocked them from further visits with Ken. However, Tom is diligently sitting in the waiting room every day at Ken’s hospital in NC and hopeful that he can get a glimpse of his brother. Ken certainly needs rest and time to recover, but he needs to see those who love him, even for a moment to know that we are here for him.
    Ken is loved by so many: his mom, brother, nephew, aunts, cousins and me.
    Prayers please for Ken’s recovery, and for his heart-broken mother. Tom Overfield ##shameful
    #kasemcares

    Nicole shared a story:

    Nicole shared a story:

    Lynne shared a story:

    My mother passed in 2004 after 64 years of marriage. The assistant pastor and his wife started sending my father cards and accepting gifts, using their religion as a means of bonding with my father, and alienating him from me. (I didn’t share their evangelism.) My father had a massive heart attack in 2008. His personal representative was deceased and he signed documents in the intensive care ward surrounded by his whole family, including a cousin who facilitated a his decision making (a disinterested party). The assistant pastor was in the room; when my father wanted to include him as a taker, I he looked at everyone and declined. I went to the bank with the power of attorney but the bank didn’t tell me my father had a $13k CD POD to the assistant pastor. When he died I learned about the bequest and couldn’t stop it. I appealed to the church in our home state, who said they would never allow such a thing, but my parents had retired to AR and the bishop of the church there approved it, even though it was not going to the church.

    Additionally, there was a second CD for $13k which has disappeared. The bank has no explanation and has taken the position that the CD that went to the assistant pastor is one and the same.

    The Arkansas Bank Department is responsible for enforcing bank records retention. They were not helpful.

    The Federal Reserve is responsible for regulating this bank and has decided to side with the bank and refuses to discuss the matter with me, even though I am a retired attorney. My US Senator’s office accepts the Federal Reserve’s decision and says there’s nothing they can do.

    I am appalled.

    I have used a psuedonym but will be happy to provide my personal information if you can help me.

    Thanks for reading this.

    Brenda shared a story:

    Here in Australia it happens in a big way. long story short. My sister’s Partners family I dumped him in a facility when he didn’t yet need to be there at all. They used the facility staff as policeman to keep my sister out which they did not manage to do for long because the stuff realised that she was not as rotten as his family said she was.
    The worst part was when he was diagnosed with very minor spots on the lung of cancer. he was he was 65 and fit and lucid enough to Converse forever and laugh at Judge Judy and follow the plot. They left his cancer untreated and he died 6 and a half years later. A professor at the hospital where he died asked my sister why he had been left untreated for 6 and a half years because he could well have survived. All she could say was it is not my fault his family would not let me get him treated. The reason for this all was he had signed his powers of attorney under duress with my sister in the room telling him not to sign but he did bla his son’s said they would never speak to him again. He died a very bad death and we consider this murder deliberate murder. His family also managed to get his home loan refinanced by having him sign loan documents well they knew he had been diagnosed with early Alzheimer’s but the bank did not. Be aware there are murderers bastards out there as well who refuse their elderly family members medical treatment. I welcome any correspondence end I support Travis Campbell.

    Kathleen shared a story:

    Kathleen shared a story:

    Steven shared a story:

    Steven shared a story:

    My personal journey into aging services began with a gut feeling that
    there will be a huge amount of boomers and seniors, wanting and
    needing information support and services in the next 20 years. When
    you look at aging trends and aging demographics, that is an
    understatement. What it means for those already in the business or
    considering entering aging services for seniors is opportunity.
    There are almost 40 million people aged 65+ in the United States.
    That is almost 13% of the population. By 2030 there will be more than
    72 million older persons making up 19% of the population.
    Someone turns 50 every 8 seconds. Each year more than 3.5 million
    boomers turn 55. By 2012, America’s 50 and older population will
    reach 100 million.
    According to the Administration on Aging of The Department of Health
    and Human Services:
    • The number of Americans who will reach 65 over the next two decades
    increased by 31% during this past decade.
    • If you reach 65 you can expect to live almost 19 more years.
    • No surprise that women outnumber men by almost 6 million.
    • Seventy two percent of older men are married; 42% of women are
    married.
    • About 31% (11.2 million) older persons live alone.
    • Almost a half a million grandparents have primary responsibility for their
    grandchildren.
    • The population of 65+ will increase from 35 million in 2000 to 55 million in
    2020.
    • The 85+ populations are projected to increase from 4.2 million in 2000 to
    6.6 million in 2020.
    • Minority populations are projected to increase from 5.7 million in 2000 to
    12.9 million in 2020 representing 23.6% of the elderly.
    • Major sources of income for older people in 2007 were: Social Security –
    87%; income from assets – 52%; private pensions – 28%; government
    employee pensions -13%; and earnings – 25%.
    In addition, aging is a global phenomenon. By 2030, 55 countries are
    expected to see their 65 and older populations reach least 20 percent
    of their total population. There are more people aged 65 and older
    than the entire populations of Russia, Japan, France, Germany .

    Jude shared a story:

    Hi Carrie I’ll try and be brief I wish I had read about your story back in September but I want to say how sorry I am that you’ve gone through such a terrible time in the past. My father was hidden away without any disclosure of address between September 2017 and November 2017. Because the eldest brother has power of attorney nobody would help I contacted everyone from assembly people to the Senator’s office District Attorney’s office Social Services my dad’s doctor Police Department I was just shocked by the lack of help. Because of my dad being hit in the way he is also blind legally his house of course it. Which was my primary worry once he entered hospital I contacted Social Services again because I have an extremely dysfunctional family that I stay away from I was the only person outing the fact that my dad was being hidden and things that were being done to him I was treated very badly by Young nurse who was caring for him on his first night there as if I was a source of the problem my son also witnessed this. I finally got a little help on the social services side when a house supervisor helped me out as I needed to report an incident the poww brother intercepted a phone call on the hospital phone and try to intimidate me and told me to stay away. After this call a few days later all sorts of information was texted to me and disclosed update on his hospital care were given and I had one day of happy victory. My dad was been moved by the p o w and a sibling who happens to be an RN have the eldest brother also works for Kaiser but not in a medical capacity. I wanted that house supervisor and case manager to document what happened to the police and I called at least 8 to 10 times speaking to every department and no one ever returns my calls. I am a single parent of low-income therefore getting a lawyer is not an option but I just wanted them to be accountable for what they did to my dad since they got in trouble at that hospital I’m assuming as all information had been overturned to me by the way the caregiver that they hid him away with quit as soon as her address was given. They have now moved him to a hospital so far away that they know it will be difficult for me to visit once he was out of hospital he is now living with that RN who is the spokesperson and receiving 24/7 care with caregivers coming in because she lives so far away and I haven’t spoken to her in over 9 years because she is a mentally unstable person but no charges have been made by people in the past which is unfortunate she always comes up smelling of roses. Fortunately my dad is still alive and with us I thought we were going to lose him before Thanksgiving as a result of the treatment he had and the isolation he suffered between September and November she has suffered some small Strokes and now can no longer speak well enough to understand over the phone they’ve put him so far away. I am not a freeway driver they know it is difficult for me to get there and I have not been invited or given certain times to be there so that I do not run into other family members. I just want the power of attorney who has pretty much put that RN in charge of everything and as far as I can see never even visited him just takes care of paperwork to be accountable and for it to be documented as to what they did to my father. I wanted it 2 be local law so that the police will have to be involved, I wanted to be a crime to hide an elderly person and a crime to not disclose and address for an elderly person this is the reason why no one on a city level would get involved not even the DA’s office people like me who do not have access to lawyers cannot get any help trust me I called the ACLU legal aid every single number you can think of I called and I am now exhausted and my heart breaks because I don’t know when I will never see my father again. He was always an enabler of abuse that’s why I don’t see my estranged mother to the siblings and their behavior and so I stay away even when they were hiding him and he could still speak because he was blind he didn’t know where he was and he didn’t want to rock the boat and now the poor man can’t even eat he wanted so much to have a Thanksgiving dinner she’s been on the tube since November. Maybe with your help we can speak to assembly people and our local senators and get a law passed to make it a crime to hide an elderly person without an address you cannot get a welfare check social services Just Smiles and says I can’t help you it is imperative that a laws passed so that police and District Attorney’s office has to help and find an elderly person that’s in Hidden Away. Anyway I’m so sorry for your loss love your dad and the horrible stress you’ve gone through thank you for your time and I pray that all people contact and write a letter to their assembly person to get this ball rolling let’s make it a law let’s get legislation to pass this so no one will ever have to suffer not knowing where an elderly person is and for that elderly person not to be isolated. Everyone knows isolation break a person down this is why it is used in prisons but should never be used on civilians and those weaker than ourselves. Thank you j u d e Mata s

    Amy shared a story:

    If you and your family have evidence put in a binder followed by excel spreadsheet, make reference to the binder. I was informed by police captain and prosecutors office of my county which I reside in Arkansas, NO funds or position exist for a detective to sort through evidence. 100% has sucked reliving the nightmare of what happened to my grandmother, but I now know what happened, and ready to help other families. Amy Arkansas

    Zig shared a story:

    My sister illegally appointed herself Moms POA-with the help of a Financial Planner whom wasn’t an Attorney to make the Trust change. I spent years being hurt over this as sister whom lived out of state liquidated assets over $600,000. hid money after writing inventory twice of cash-1 years apart-said that she made a financial error. Not involving Attorney or Notary as promised a month before. Then brings Mom while always lacking capacity to an Attorney to do the same change that was illegally done 5 years before-to protect herself. I reported inventory to APS, Police, FBI-all did nothing because its Civil-WOW. Brought to court and court doesn’t investigate for Elders protection and states- yeah miss counted extra 80% of cash, its what the guardian says and that’s all that is being considered. Looked for money in only one place when other evidence attempted to be presented to disprove decision- was rejected-was threatened to shut up or get thrown out of court room-?
    Justice for Sale in the OC.
    Appellate Court denied also for a technicality. They too ignored fact that same attorney consulted with Appellate-represented Respondent-Ignored. Now Moms health is again is compromised and Im being denied her closest child to know anything about ailing condition that appears eminent more recently than expected.

    SOMETHING WILL CHANGE THIS SYSTEM-GOD WILLING-ITS UNFATHOMABLE.

    Beth aka shared a story:

    Beth aka shared a story:

    Beth shared a story:

    I may not be an elderly lady yet, but I will in time. I am a young blind woman who was guardianized as a result of a big lie the Florida courts told me and as a result of manipulative and controlling parents who did not feel that I was living a safe life according to them. AS a blind person, and as a blind person with secondary mental health diagnoses up my belt, I found it hard to fight the guardianship. It is not full, but the key parts of the guardianship that my parents have control over are marriage, medical records and treatment, legal residence, social affairs, most of the rights adults would normally have by eighteen, but sadly, I didn’t get. I could however vote, hold a fast food job, travel, and apply for government benefits. I left Florida in 2010 because I wanted to have a distanced rehabilitation program in Littleton take over my rehabilitation. I went to the Colorado Center for the BLind, a school in Littleton that allows me to learn independence skills like cooking, cleaning, and traveling around the city of Denver. Because they stressed me out more, making me clean other people’s messes for being late, and because it became a trigger for me because before then, I was treated like a maid by my parents, I now have a PCA clean my apartment. Otherwise, I have a loving partner who is trying to help me get through this. SInce the guardianship has no weight in Colorado, I’ve come to a point where I want my medical privacy and the right to get pregnant but I’m afraid that my parents could book me a flight home to them, where there is no transport, no buses, and worst of all, isolation, drugs, and no friends to help me at all. They’d tell me to go to their inaccessible gym, which while it’s good for anyone to exercise, I am not allowed to talk about most subjects I prefer when around my parents. They try to control my every move, and plan to keep the guardianship because I don’t have a job. The thing is I’ve been in Colorado for 7 years and have been distant from my family since now I have a life. I sing in the Soar Youth and Adult Choir in Denver, under the direction of Emily Martin. My parents, however, live in Brevard County, Florida. I can’t get my therapists to communicate with them that my medical privacy is important because my intimate sexual details with partners would be revealed, and I am getting sick and tired of telling doctors not to add sexual details to my reports for fear that my religious family could kill me, my future husband, or future babies. As a blind person with another disability, I tried every bit of free legal recourse, including Legal Shield, but the attorneys in Brevard County won’t take my case. I have even tried contacting Disability Rights organizations, but they won’t help. As my life progresses, I’m afraid that I would become one of the isolated, drugged-to-death elders that populate nursing homes in Florida. If I could change one thing about this situation, it would be to tell my parents off for having guardianship and for hurting relationships with other people as a result. Men would run away from me and after seeing a friend freed by Kasem Cares, I personally feel that this is my last hope. I could be told to go home at any given moment, but I was told to get the police on them, but not sure how effective that will be. The moral of this story: don’t get guardianship of a blind person and do this to cover up your own failures. My parents’ guardianship was justified in their minds by me hanging out with a 51-year-old guy at 17, which though scary, was not perceived as predatory by me. The guy, however, was not the best at being good anyway, but the parents freaked out and started accusing him of grooming me for sex, but little would I know that this would ruin my whole life, which it shouldn’t. IF I were governor, or President, I would illegalize this case and make all guardianships illegal for all persons with a capacity for indpendence, and encourage strongly all parents to get some kind of education on disability and sex before they make any decisions at all.

    Yolanda shared a story:

    Update- My mom is with my older sister now and safe – thanks for the help. Please update and remove personal info, names, numbers from last post

    Danna shared a story:

    I’m not comfortable sharing my story anymore but I want to lend my support to all of you suffering from this terrible crime. It’s a lonely business. There are still people who are close to me who have no idea what it’s like to experience elder abuse with a parent. Hang in there and do NOT stop visiting, if at all possible.

    Doug shared a story:

    Hello, My Dad is in the later stages of Alzheimer’s and two of my sister’s one of which has power of attorney have told the nurses at the assisted living center where my Dad is, not to give me any information at all about how my Dad is doing. I live ten and a half hours away from the assisted living center where Dad is and as of now I don’t even have a vehicle or the funds necessary to visit my Dad. Unlike my two sisters I am on a very low income($778 a month) and after my bills are paid I’m lucky if I have $20 left over. The pain and heartache has gotten too much to bear and the thought that I will never see my Dad again before he passes is something I’m having a great deal of trouble even thinking about. I myself have severe cirrhosis and the daily pain of that and the thought of not seeing my Dad has put me on the very edge of not wanting to go on any longer. The reason my two sisters have kept my Dad’s well being from me is because I haven’t gone down to see him before now and they feel that I should have. They fail to realize that I don’t have what it takes to make the long drive down to see my Dad, something I have wished I was able to do for quite awhile now. I have prayed to God for help, but it seems as if my prayers have fallen on deaf ears. If I could only explain how much pain this causes me!

    Annette shared a story:

    My husband is locked up for a least five years by Elizabeth greile an a p s worker she did not investigate anything a disgruntled drug addict made up a story because she wants to be a Care giver for him and I don’t like her so now our lives are destroyed able guardian ad litem is stealing his retirement and I am a 70yr homeless wife of 31yrs and not allowed to be near my husband this asp woman needs to be gone she lies and gets her way it’s all about money we need protection from asp my husband sits by a window
    All day with tears in his eyes hoping his wife will show up to get him she declared him incompetent herself no doctor and illegally got a no contact order he can’t see any body he wants to see now he wants to die and so do I

    Jennifer shared a story:

    My Grandpa was a victim of elder abuse by his second wife. A few months after my beautiful and wonderful Grandma passed away, the love of his life for over 50 years- my Grandpa went on various senior citizen trips etc. One fateful day he met the woman who would become his second wife on one of those trips.

    We tolerated her for my Grandpa’s sake but she ran hot and cold so she was hard to connect with.

    The control issues started when she made him take down pictures of his kids and grandkids. Then once they moved to Arizona from Minnesota, the isolation started.

    We would try calling him but the phone would always be off the hook, so she would turn around and tell him his family didn’t care. We later found out she also told parishioners at their church and neighbors that my grandpa had no family.

    When we could fly to Arizona to visit, she played the gate keeper and we could only visit on certain days and not for very long. She would start to put ideas in my grandfather’s head that we were going to steal his money etc. We could never have alone time with him, she had to be a part of every conversation and interrupt.

    Fast forward some time later, his wife was battling cancer and hired in home help.
    By the grace of God, this nurse found an address book and contacted my Aunt letting her know that my Grandpa was being hit by his wife. The wheels were set in motion to get my Grandpa out of that abusive situation and back to Minnesota. Can you believe despite this woman battling cancer, she still found the strength to abuse my Grandpa?

    By the time guardianship was established which was a long process, and at first had been denied. Thankfully Grandpa was finally able to come home to Minnesota where he got to spend the last 3 months of his life with his family and rightfully buried next to the love of his life.

    His evil second wife died three months later.

    My Grandpa was her fifth husband. We also learned that she had pulled the same isolation and abuse on husband number 4 before he died.

    My heart aches for those who are going through similar situations. It is so devestating and makes for a painful chapter in a family’s legacy.

    Helen shared a story:

    Our father was killed in April. His wife has excluded us from everything. We don’t even have ashes. Wr have contacted many lawyers and have been told we don’t have a leg to stand on legally. In the last year of my fathers life we saw him very little. His wife always found an excuse to cancel meeting. We weren’t aloud to just go to see him. Now we have nothing that was our fathers. Nothing!

    Mary shared a story:

    My dad was diagnosed with brain cancer in March of 2013. Up until this time he was very independent. He drove, paid his bills, visited people….. To make a long story short, doctor appointments were rescheduled or cancelled without my knowledge, medication was not properly administered, the alleged perpetrator told the doctor he was on medication that he was not on…… The alleged perpetrator talked my father into treatments my dad said his entire life he did not want. My father was taken to his bank (not the normal branch he went to) where he closed out his accounts…… he was taken to a lawyer and his will was changed…….. His landline blocked my calls as well as the calls from the catholic church he had attended for close to 40 years, he was no longer attending that particular church. APS was involved, and one of the investigators told me he thought my dad was being abused, but he could not prove it.

    My dad eventually ended up in the hospital . The person who lived at his house would not make modifications to the home to accommodate his needs, would not hire a caregiver….. and eventually would not allow my father back into his own home. My father moved in with us for the last month of his life and died peacefully in our home surrounded by our family while my dad’s attorney tried to evict the person living in his home. Following my dad’s death was a long and drawn out probate & we contested nothing. It was initiated and fueled by the perpetrator. One of the APS supervisors told me he forwarded one of the employees of the church to law enforcement for failure of a mandatory reporter to report suspected abuse. I also received a letter from the vicar general of the diocese who apologized for any ways in which anyone from the church left me feeling hurt, disrespected or dismissed.

    Again for the sake of brevity a lot of details have been omitted.

    Kathleen shared a story:

    I had an elderly bachelor uncle who lived on Waterfront Property on Raft Island in Gig Harbor, Washington who sold his home and moved into a major local Retirement Home in Tacoma, Washington. He was talked into selling and was swindled on the sale. The Realtor found an Independent Caregiver through the Retirement Home. I picked up on her right away and kept calling Adult Protective Services. She kept moving him around and was slowly turning him away from our family. No one would tell me where he was. I had to contact the Police on some occasions. She took his car away from him lying about why and sold it. She finally got Power of Attorney on him. He said he didn’t sign anything and didn’t give it to her. I had a Private Investigator run a Background Check on her and discovered she stole from others. APS got back involved and went to his Bank where they discovered she stole thousands of dollars from him and moved his accounts around putting them in her name. One account said “Pay on Death” to her. He had a Pension. APS froze his accounts and removed her and brought in a Professional Legal Guardian. She was to keep me updated on what was going on with him. She charged his account every time she spoke to me. No one could give me any information because he had a Legal Guardian and I was told things through her. I contacted my local Washington State Senator who opened up an investigation and got a law passed here in Washington State on FBI Background Checks on Long Terms Caregivers and throughout the Country. After his death I was able to hire an Attorney who made me personal representative of his Estate. He was able to get all the paperwork the State filed in The Kitsap County Courthouse. I was able to sue the Bank for failing to report Financial Abuse. We found out that Bank Employees are “Passive Reporters” NOT “Mandated Reporters.” There needs to be a law made about that. I am writing a Screenplay about his story hoping to put an emphasis on Elder Abuse. Thank you.

    Deborah shared a story:

    My Father had Parkinson’s and mild dementia a Doctor’s order had been sent to his assisted living facility saying he could travel with assistance but needed to be in assisted living once he got to Alaska( where my mother is from) Not My blind handicapped mother and to live in my cousins over crowded apartment . The inconsistency in care (WHICH I TOLD THE ASSISTED LIVING HOME THEY WERE IN) took my father from mild dementia to deep dementia in 9 weeks. Then he was hospitalized moved to 3 different homes in Alaska within a year and 3 mos. he died. Absolutely ridiculous. I sent emails to Adult Protection prior their leaving and Kathy Young N. Y. State Senator’s office. ( I got a letter 3 days after they left ) that they would help along with the assisted living facility to keep my parents safe. The whole ordeal could have been avoided had jobs been done. They worried about my parents rights and didn’t care about “They’re safety”

    Kathy shared a story:

    Kathleen shared a story:

    4 years ago, I received a phone call from my brother saying my Dad was in the hospital. We weren’t sure what had happened, only that he had fallen and Glynna (my stepmother) could not get him up. As the story unfolded, I quickly learned that the medics were uncertain how long he had laid there, because his blood had pooled on one side of his body, he was found with feces caked on his arms, and the house was in deplorable conditions. My dad had severely infected bed sores, as well. My Dad’s wife, Glynna does not work, and was with him the entire time. When I arrived at the hospital, Glynna seemed to be standoffish, and didn’t want to speak to me about his condition or what happened. I had no idea why, we had never had any issues prior to this. She became hostile toward me, and actually had me removed by security at the hospital, it was unbelievable! I immediately filed for Guardianship. She filed shortly after me, and gifted the house to herself that was my father’s home many years before they had married. My brother, Greg, who is bipolar and taking no meds, and has a criminal record, and could not ascertain guardianship status become threatening and volatile toward my family, and our mother. I was trespassed from my Dad’s house for over a year. The entire time, my Dad’s diseases are progressing, he has Dementia & Parkinson Disease. Finally, after going to court, and enduring all the ugliness and lies told about me, I told my attorney that it would be best if a third party was appointed as a guardian. I was emotionally and mentally exhausted, it had consumed me. During the time that the guardian has taken over, my Dad’s wife and my brother have made it difficult for me to see him. His wife never leaves the room when I come to visit. My brother tries to intimidate me when he knows I am coming over by showing up. I have gotten to see my Dad, but it is by far, under good circumstances. As of late, my father is declining in his health. He is completely bedridden and they have stopped therapy altogether. They have brought aides in Monday through Fridays from 12-3. Apparently, his wife is unable to lift him by herself. Back in January, my daughter went to visit, and Glynna and my brother stood at the door and wouldn’t let us in. My brother became verbally threatening to my 19 year old daughter, by calling her names. During the process of me filing for guardianship, my brother threatened my family and mother to the point that I had to file a restraining order against him. So, my daughter called the police, and Glynna called the guardian. The guardian was furious that we called the police. She was clearly angry with me on the phone about it. I explained to her that my brother is unpredictable being bipolar, and he was threatening to us. So, a few days later, I receive an email from the guardian stating that I am no longer allowed over when my dad has aides or therapists there. Also, I am only allowed to have 3 unannounced visits a year, and then the rest of the time I am to schedule visits with his wife. I am beside myself with all of this craziness. Also, did I mention the guardian is now doing Glynna’s bills for her? No conflict of interest there!! As a single parent, I had to take out a personal loan to pay for the guardianship case. I feel as though, the guardian has only her best interest at hand and not my father’s. I asked the Guardian if my brother had the same stipulations as I did, and she refused to discuss it with me. I feel she is very biased toward Glynna and is treating me as the enemy, and that because it became public record that the police were there because of a matter involving the guardianship, which makes the guardian appear incompetent, is why I am no longer allowed to come at any time. Please help me in this matter!! I will do whatever it takes to help you file the visitation bill here in Ohio.

    Emotionally Exhausted