Share Your Story

You’re not alone. Please share your story here so that others can benefit from your experiences. We can help each other heal and can take action together.

* Please note that we do not share your information with other organizations. We are here to support you and we may reach out to you to learn more about your story. Please let us know immediately via email if you are contacted by groups other than Kasem Cares as a result of your communication with us.  

    Nicole shared a story:

    Nicole shared a story:

    Lynne shared a story:

    My mother passed in 2004 after 64 years of marriage. The assistant pastor and his wife started sending my father cards and accepting gifts, using their religion as a means of bonding with my father, and alienating him from me. (I didn’t share their evangelism.) My father had a massive heart attack in 2008. His personal representative was deceased and he signed documents in the intensive care ward surrounded by his whole family, including a cousin who facilitated a his decision making (a disinterested party). The assistant pastor was in the room; when my father wanted to include him as a taker, I he looked at everyone and declined. I went to the bank with the power of attorney but the bank didn’t tell me my father had a $13k CD POD to the assistant pastor. When he died I learned about the bequest and couldn’t stop it. I appealed to the church in our home state, who said they would never allow such a thing, but my parents had retired to AR and the bishop of the church there approved it, even though it was not going to the church.

    Additionally, there was a second CD for $13k which has disappeared. The bank has no explanation and has taken the position that the CD that went to the assistant pastor is one and the same.

    The Arkansas Bank Department is responsible for enforcing bank records retention. They were not helpful.

    The Federal Reserve is responsible for regulating this bank and has decided to side with the bank and refuses to discuss the matter with me, even though I am a retired attorney. My US Senator’s office accepts the Federal Reserve’s decision and says there’s nothing they can do.

    I am appalled.

    I have used a psuedonym but will be happy to provide my personal information if you can help me.

    Thanks for reading this.

    Brenda shared a story:

    Here in Australia it happens in a big way. long story short. My sister’s Partners family I dumped him in a facility when he didn’t yet need to be there at all. They used the facility staff as policeman to keep my sister out which they did not manage to do for long because the stuff realised that she was not as rotten as his family said she was.
    The worst part was when he was diagnosed with very minor spots on the lung of cancer. he was he was 65 and fit and lucid enough to Converse forever and laugh at Judge Judy and follow the plot. They left his cancer untreated and he died 6 and a half years later. A professor at the hospital where he died asked my sister why he had been left untreated for 6 and a half years because he could well have survived. All she could say was it is not my fault his family would not let me get him treated. The reason for this all was he had signed his powers of attorney under duress with my sister in the room telling him not to sign but he did bla his son’s said they would never speak to him again. He died a very bad death and we consider this murder deliberate murder. His family also managed to get his home loan refinanced by having him sign loan documents well they knew he had been diagnosed with early Alzheimer’s but the bank did not. Be aware there are murderers bastards out there as well who refuse their elderly family members medical treatment. I welcome any correspondence end I support Travis Campbell.

    Kathleen shared a story:

    Kathleen shared a story:

    Steven shared a story:

    Steven shared a story:

    My personal journey into aging services began with a gut feeling that
    there will be a huge amount of boomers and seniors, wanting and
    needing information support and services in the next 20 years. When
    you look at aging trends and aging demographics, that is an
    understatement. What it means for those already in the business or
    considering entering aging services for seniors is opportunity.
    There are almost 40 million people aged 65+ in the United States.
    That is almost 13% of the population. By 2030 there will be more than
    72 million older persons making up 19% of the population.
    Someone turns 50 every 8 seconds. Each year more than 3.5 million
    boomers turn 55. By 2012, America’s 50 and older population will
    reach 100 million.
    According to the Administration on Aging of The Department of Health
    and Human Services:
    • The number of Americans who will reach 65 over the next two decades
    increased by 31% during this past decade.
    • If you reach 65 you can expect to live almost 19 more years.
    • No surprise that women outnumber men by almost 6 million.
    • Seventy two percent of older men are married; 42% of women are
    • About 31% (11.2 million) older persons live alone.
    • Almost a half a million grandparents have primary responsibility for their
    • The population of 65+ will increase from 35 million in 2000 to 55 million in
    • The 85+ populations are projected to increase from 4.2 million in 2000 to
    6.6 million in 2020.
    • Minority populations are projected to increase from 5.7 million in 2000 to
    12.9 million in 2020 representing 23.6% of the elderly.
    • Major sources of income for older people in 2007 were: Social Security –
    87%; income from assets – 52%; private pensions – 28%; government
    employee pensions -13%; and earnings – 25%.
    In addition, aging is a global phenomenon. By 2030, 55 countries are
    expected to see their 65 and older populations reach least 20 percent
    of their total population. There are more people aged 65 and older
    than the entire populations of Russia, Japan, France, Germany .

    Jude shared a story:

    Hi Carrie I’ll try and be brief I wish I had read about your story back in September but I want to say how sorry I am that you’ve gone through such a terrible time in the past. My father was hidden away without any disclosure of address between September 2017 and November 2017. Because the eldest brother has power of attorney nobody would help I contacted everyone from assembly people to the Senator’s office District Attorney’s office Social Services my dad’s doctor Police Department I was just shocked by the lack of help. Because of my dad being hit in the way he is also blind legally his house of course it. Which was my primary worry once he entered hospital I contacted Social Services again because I have an extremely dysfunctional family that I stay away from I was the only person outing the fact that my dad was being hidden and things that were being done to him I was treated very badly by Young nurse who was caring for him on his first night there as if I was a source of the problem my son also witnessed this. I finally got a little help on the social services side when a house supervisor helped me out as I needed to report an incident the poww brother intercepted a phone call on the hospital phone and try to intimidate me and told me to stay away. After this call a few days later all sorts of information was texted to me and disclosed update on his hospital care were given and I had one day of happy victory. My dad was been moved by the p o w and a sibling who happens to be an RN have the eldest brother also works for Kaiser but not in a medical capacity. I wanted that house supervisor and case manager to document what happened to the police and I called at least 8 to 10 times speaking to every department and no one ever returns my calls. I am a single parent of low-income therefore getting a lawyer is not an option but I just wanted them to be accountable for what they did to my dad since they got in trouble at that hospital I’m assuming as all information had been overturned to me by the way the caregiver that they hid him away with quit as soon as her address was given. They have now moved him to a hospital so far away that they know it will be difficult for me to visit once he was out of hospital he is now living with that RN who is the spokesperson and receiving 24/7 care with caregivers coming in because she lives so far away and I haven’t spoken to her in over 9 years because she is a mentally unstable person but no charges have been made by people in the past which is unfortunate she always comes up smelling of roses. Fortunately my dad is still alive and with us I thought we were going to lose him before Thanksgiving as a result of the treatment he had and the isolation he suffered between September and November she has suffered some small Strokes and now can no longer speak well enough to understand over the phone they’ve put him so far away. I am not a freeway driver they know it is difficult for me to get there and I have not been invited or given certain times to be there so that I do not run into other family members. I just want the power of attorney who has pretty much put that RN in charge of everything and as far as I can see never even visited him just takes care of paperwork to be accountable and for it to be documented as to what they did to my father. I wanted it 2 be local law so that the police will have to be involved, I wanted to be a crime to hide an elderly person and a crime to not disclose and address for an elderly person this is the reason why no one on a city level would get involved not even the DA’s office people like me who do not have access to lawyers cannot get any help trust me I called the ACLU legal aid every single number you can think of I called and I am now exhausted and my heart breaks because I don’t know when I will never see my father again. He was always an enabler of abuse that’s why I don’t see my estranged mother to the siblings and their behavior and so I stay away even when they were hiding him and he could still speak because he was blind he didn’t know where he was and he didn’t want to rock the boat and now the poor man can’t even eat he wanted so much to have a Thanksgiving dinner she’s been on the tube since November. Maybe with your help we can speak to assembly people and our local senators and get a law passed to make it a crime to hide an elderly person without an address you cannot get a welfare check social services Just Smiles and says I can’t help you it is imperative that a laws passed so that police and District Attorney’s office has to help and find an elderly person that’s in Hidden Away. Anyway I’m so sorry for your loss love your dad and the horrible stress you’ve gone through thank you for your time and I pray that all people contact and write a letter to their assembly person to get this ball rolling let’s make it a law let’s get legislation to pass this so no one will ever have to suffer not knowing where an elderly person is and for that elderly person not to be isolated. Everyone knows isolation break a person down this is why it is used in prisons but should never be used on civilians and those weaker than ourselves. Thank you j u d e Mata s

    Amy shared a story:

    If you and your family have evidence put in a binder followed by excel spreadsheet, make reference to the binder. I was informed by police captain and prosecutors office of my county which I reside in Arkansas, NO funds or position exist for a detective to sort through evidence. 100% has sucked reliving the nightmare of what happened to my grandmother, but I now know what happened, and ready to help other families. Amy Arkansas

    Zig shared a story:

    My sister illegally appointed herself Moms POA-with the help of a Financial Planner whom wasn’t an Attorney to make the Trust change. I spent years being hurt over this as sister whom lived out of state liquidated assets over $600,000. hid money after writing inventory twice of cash-1 years apart-said that she made a financial error. Not involving Attorney or Notary as promised a month before. Then brings Mom while always lacking capacity to an Attorney to do the same change that was illegally done 5 years before-to protect herself. I reported inventory to APS, Police, FBI-all did nothing because its Civil-WOW. Brought to court and court doesn’t investigate for Elders protection and states- yeah miss counted extra 80% of cash, its what the guardian says and that’s all that is being considered. Looked for money in only one place when other evidence attempted to be presented to disprove decision- was rejected-was threatened to shut up or get thrown out of court room-?
    Justice for Sale in the OC.
    Appellate Court denied also for a technicality. They too ignored fact that same attorney consulted with Appellate-represented Respondent-Ignored. Now Moms health is again is compromised and Im being denied her closest child to know anything about ailing condition that appears eminent more recently than expected.


    Beth aka shared a story:

    Beth aka shared a story:

    Beth shared a story:

    I may not be an elderly lady yet, but I will in time. I am a young blind woman who was guardianized as a result of a big lie the Florida courts told me and as a result of manipulative and controlling parents who did not feel that I was living a safe life according to them. AS a blind person, and as a blind person with secondary mental health diagnoses up my belt, I found it hard to fight the guardianship. It is not full, but the key parts of the guardianship that my parents have control over are marriage, medical records and treatment, legal residence, social affairs, most of the rights adults would normally have by eighteen, but sadly, I didn’t get. I could however vote, hold a fast food job, travel, and apply for government benefits. I left Florida in 2010 because I wanted to have a distanced rehabilitation program in Littleton take over my rehabilitation. I went to the Colorado Center for the BLind, a school in Littleton that allows me to learn independence skills like cooking, cleaning, and traveling around the city of Denver. Because they stressed me out more, making me clean other people’s messes for being late, and because it became a trigger for me because before then, I was treated like a maid by my parents, I now have a PCA clean my apartment. Otherwise, I have a loving partner who is trying to help me get through this. SInce the guardianship has no weight in Colorado, I’ve come to a point where I want my medical privacy and the right to get pregnant but I’m afraid that my parents could book me a flight home to them, where there is no transport, no buses, and worst of all, isolation, drugs, and no friends to help me at all. They’d tell me to go to their inaccessible gym, which while it’s good for anyone to exercise, I am not allowed to talk about most subjects I prefer when around my parents. They try to control my every move, and plan to keep the guardianship because I don’t have a job. The thing is I’ve been in Colorado for 7 years and have been distant from my family since now I have a life. I sing in the Soar Youth and Adult Choir in Denver, under the direction of Emily Martin. My parents, however, live in Brevard County, Florida. I can’t get my therapists to communicate with them that my medical privacy is important because my intimate sexual details with partners would be revealed, and I am getting sick and tired of telling doctors not to add sexual details to my reports for fear that my religious family could kill me, my future husband, or future babies. As a blind person with another disability, I tried every bit of free legal recourse, including Legal Shield, but the attorneys in Brevard County won’t take my case. I have even tried contacting Disability Rights organizations, but they won’t help. As my life progresses, I’m afraid that I would become one of the isolated, drugged-to-death elders that populate nursing homes in Florida. If I could change one thing about this situation, it would be to tell my parents off for having guardianship and for hurting relationships with other people as a result. Men would run away from me and after seeing a friend freed by Kasem Cares, I personally feel that this is my last hope. I could be told to go home at any given moment, but I was told to get the police on them, but not sure how effective that will be. The moral of this story: don’t get guardianship of a blind person and do this to cover up your own failures. My parents’ guardianship was justified in their minds by me hanging out with a 51-year-old guy at 17, which though scary, was not perceived as predatory by me. The guy, however, was not the best at being good anyway, but the parents freaked out and started accusing him of grooming me for sex, but little would I know that this would ruin my whole life, which it shouldn’t. IF I were governor, or President, I would illegalize this case and make all guardianships illegal for all persons with a capacity for indpendence, and encourage strongly all parents to get some kind of education on disability and sex before they make any decisions at all.

    Yolanda shared a story:

    Update- My mom is with my older sister now and safe – thanks for the help. Please update and remove personal info, names, numbers from last post

    Danna shared a story:

    I’m not comfortable sharing my story anymore but I want to lend my support to all of you suffering from this terrible crime. It’s a lonely business. There are still people who are close to me who have no idea what it’s like to experience elder abuse with a parent. Hang in there and do NOT stop visiting, if at all possible.

    Doug shared a story:

    Hello, My Dad is in the later stages of Alzheimer’s and two of my sister’s one of which has power of attorney have told the nurses at the assisted living center where my Dad is, not to give me any information at all about how my Dad is doing. I live ten and a half hours away from the assisted living center where Dad is and as of now I don’t even have a vehicle or the funds necessary to visit my Dad. Unlike my two sisters I am on a very low income($778 a month) and after my bills are paid I’m lucky if I have $20 left over. The pain and heartache has gotten too much to bear and the thought that I will never see my Dad again before he passes is something I’m having a great deal of trouble even thinking about. I myself have severe cirrhosis and the daily pain of that and the thought of not seeing my Dad has put me on the very edge of not wanting to go on any longer. The reason my two sisters have kept my Dad’s well being from me is because I haven’t gone down to see him before now and they feel that I should have. They fail to realize that I don’t have what it takes to make the long drive down to see my Dad, something I have wished I was able to do for quite awhile now. I have prayed to God for help, but it seems as if my prayers have fallen on deaf ears. If I could only explain how much pain this causes me!

    Annette shared a story:

    My husband is locked up for a least five years by Elizabeth greile an a p s worker she did not investigate anything a disgruntled drug addict made up a story because she wants to be a Care giver for him and I don’t like her so now our lives are destroyed able guardian ad litem is stealing his retirement and I am a 70yr homeless wife of 31yrs and not allowed to be near my husband this asp woman needs to be gone she lies and gets her way it’s all about money we need protection from asp my husband sits by a window
    All day with tears in his eyes hoping his wife will show up to get him she declared him incompetent herself no doctor and illegally got a no contact order he can’t see any body he wants to see now he wants to die and so do I

    Jennifer shared a story:

    My Grandpa was a victim of elder abuse by his second wife. A few months after my beautiful and wonderful Grandma passed away, the love of his life for over 50 years- my Grandpa went on various senior citizen trips etc. One fateful day he met the woman who would become his second wife on one of those trips.

    We tolerated her for my Grandpa’s sake but she ran hot and cold so she was hard to connect with.

    The control issues started when she made him take down pictures of his kids and grandkids. Then once they moved to Arizona from Minnesota, the isolation started.

    We would try calling him but the phone would always be off the hook, so she would turn around and tell him his family didn’t care. We later found out she also told parishioners at their church and neighbors that my grandpa had no family.

    When we could fly to Arizona to visit, she played the gate keeper and we could only visit on certain days and not for very long. She would start to put ideas in my grandfather’s head that we were going to steal his money etc. We could never have alone time with him, she had to be a part of every conversation and interrupt.

    Fast forward some time later, his wife was battling cancer and hired in home help.
    By the grace of God, this nurse found an address book and contacted my Aunt letting her know that my Grandpa was being hit by his wife. The wheels were set in motion to get my Grandpa out of that abusive situation and back to Minnesota. Can you believe despite this woman battling cancer, she still found the strength to abuse my Grandpa?

    By the time guardianship was established which was a long process, and at first had been denied. Thankfully Grandpa was finally able to come home to Minnesota where he got to spend the last 3 months of his life with his family and rightfully buried next to the love of his life.

    His evil second wife died three months later.

    My Grandpa was her fifth husband. We also learned that she had pulled the same isolation and abuse on husband number 4 before he died.

    My heart aches for those who are going through similar situations. It is so devestating and makes for a painful chapter in a family’s legacy.

    Helen shared a story:

    Our father was killed in April. His wife has excluded us from everything. We don’t even have ashes. Wr have contacted many lawyers and have been told we don’t have a leg to stand on legally. In the last year of my fathers life we saw him very little. His wife always found an excuse to cancel meeting. We weren’t aloud to just go to see him. Now we have nothing that was our fathers. Nothing!

    Mary shared a story:

    My dad was diagnosed with brain cancer in March of 2013. Up until this time he was very independent. He drove, paid his bills, visited people….. To make a long story short, doctor appointments were rescheduled or cancelled without my knowledge, medication was not properly administered, the alleged perpetrator told the doctor he was on medication that he was not on…… The alleged perpetrator talked my father into treatments my dad said his entire life he did not want. My father was taken to his bank (not the normal branch he went to) where he closed out his accounts…… he was taken to a lawyer and his will was changed…….. His landline blocked my calls as well as the calls from the catholic church he had attended for close to 40 years, he was no longer attending that particular church. APS was involved, and one of the investigators told me he thought my dad was being abused, but he could not prove it.

    My dad eventually ended up in the hospital . The person who lived at his house would not make modifications to the home to accommodate his needs, would not hire a caregiver….. and eventually would not allow my father back into his own home. My father moved in with us for the last month of his life and died peacefully in our home surrounded by our family while my dad’s attorney tried to evict the person living in his home. Following my dad’s death was a long and drawn out probate & we contested nothing. It was initiated and fueled by the perpetrator. One of the APS supervisors told me he forwarded one of the employees of the church to law enforcement for failure of a mandatory reporter to report suspected abuse. I also received a letter from the vicar general of the diocese who apologized for any ways in which anyone from the church left me feeling hurt, disrespected or dismissed.

    Again for the sake of brevity a lot of details have been omitted.

    Kathleen shared a story:

    I had an elderly bachelor uncle who lived on Waterfront Property on Raft Island in Gig Harbor, Washington who sold his home and moved into a major local Retirement Home in Tacoma, Washington. He was talked into selling and was swindled on the sale. The Realtor found an Independent Caregiver through the Retirement Home. I picked up on her right away and kept calling Adult Protective Services. She kept moving him around and was slowly turning him away from our family. No one would tell me where he was. I had to contact the Police on some occasions. She took his car away from him lying about why and sold it. She finally got Power of Attorney on him. He said he didn’t sign anything and didn’t give it to her. I had a Private Investigator run a Background Check on her and discovered she stole from others. APS got back involved and went to his Bank where they discovered she stole thousands of dollars from him and moved his accounts around putting them in her name. One account said “Pay on Death” to her. He had a Pension. APS froze his accounts and removed her and brought in a Professional Legal Guardian. She was to keep me updated on what was going on with him. She charged his account every time she spoke to me. No one could give me any information because he had a Legal Guardian and I was told things through her. I contacted my local Washington State Senator who opened up an investigation and got a law passed here in Washington State on FBI Background Checks on Long Terms Caregivers and throughout the Country. After his death I was able to hire an Attorney who made me personal representative of his Estate. He was able to get all the paperwork the State filed in The Kitsap County Courthouse. I was able to sue the Bank for failing to report Financial Abuse. We found out that Bank Employees are “Passive Reporters” NOT “Mandated Reporters.” There needs to be a law made about that. I am writing a Screenplay about his story hoping to put an emphasis on Elder Abuse. Thank you.

    Deborah shared a story:

    My Father had Parkinson’s and mild dementia a Doctor’s order had been sent to his assisted living facility saying he could travel with assistance but needed to be in assisted living once he got to Alaska( where my mother is from) Not My blind handicapped mother and to live in my cousins over crowded apartment . The inconsistency in care (WHICH I TOLD THE ASSISTED LIVING HOME THEY WERE IN) took my father from mild dementia to deep dementia in 9 weeks. Then he was hospitalized moved to 3 different homes in Alaska within a year and 3 mos. he died. Absolutely ridiculous. I sent emails to Adult Protection prior their leaving and Kathy Young N. Y. State Senator’s office. ( I got a letter 3 days after they left ) that they would help along with the assisted living facility to keep my parents safe. The whole ordeal could have been avoided had jobs been done. They worried about my parents rights and didn’t care about “They’re safety”

    Kathy shared a story:

    Kathleen shared a story:

    4 years ago, I received a phone call from my brother saying my Dad was in the hospital. We weren’t sure what had happened, only that he had fallen and Glynna (my stepmother) could not get him up. As the story unfolded, I quickly learned that the medics were uncertain how long he had laid there, because his blood had pooled on one side of his body, he was found with feces caked on his arms, and the house was in deplorable conditions. My dad had severely infected bed sores, as well. My Dad’s wife, Glynna does not work, and was with him the entire time. When I arrived at the hospital, Glynna seemed to be standoffish, and didn’t want to speak to me about his condition or what happened. I had no idea why, we had never had any issues prior to this. She became hostile toward me, and actually had me removed by security at the hospital, it was unbelievable! I immediately filed for Guardianship. She filed shortly after me, and gifted the house to herself that was my father’s home many years before they had married. My brother, Greg, who is bipolar and taking no meds, and has a criminal record, and could not ascertain guardianship status become threatening and volatile toward my family, and our mother. I was trespassed from my Dad’s house for over a year. The entire time, my Dad’s diseases are progressing, he has Dementia & Parkinson Disease. Finally, after going to court, and enduring all the ugliness and lies told about me, I told my attorney that it would be best if a third party was appointed as a guardian. I was emotionally and mentally exhausted, it had consumed me. During the time that the guardian has taken over, my Dad’s wife and my brother have made it difficult for me to see him. His wife never leaves the room when I come to visit. My brother tries to intimidate me when he knows I am coming over by showing up. I have gotten to see my Dad, but it is by far, under good circumstances. As of late, my father is declining in his health. He is completely bedridden and they have stopped therapy altogether. They have brought aides in Monday through Fridays from 12-3. Apparently, his wife is unable to lift him by herself. Back in January, my daughter went to visit, and Glynna and my brother stood at the door and wouldn’t let us in. My brother became verbally threatening to my 19 year old daughter, by calling her names. During the process of me filing for guardianship, my brother threatened my family and mother to the point that I had to file a restraining order against him. So, my daughter called the police, and Glynna called the guardian. The guardian was furious that we called the police. She was clearly angry with me on the phone about it. I explained to her that my brother is unpredictable being bipolar, and he was threatening to us. So, a few days later, I receive an email from the guardian stating that I am no longer allowed over when my dad has aides or therapists there. Also, I am only allowed to have 3 unannounced visits a year, and then the rest of the time I am to schedule visits with his wife. I am beside myself with all of this craziness. Also, did I mention the guardian is now doing Glynna’s bills for her? No conflict of interest there!! As a single parent, I had to take out a personal loan to pay for the guardianship case. I feel as though, the guardian has only her best interest at hand and not my father’s. I asked the Guardian if my brother had the same stipulations as I did, and she refused to discuss it with me. I feel she is very biased toward Glynna and is treating me as the enemy, and that because it became public record that the police were there because of a matter involving the guardianship, which makes the guardian appear incompetent, is why I am no longer allowed to come at any time. Please help me in this matter!! I will do whatever it takes to help you file the visitation bill here in Ohio.

    Emotionally Exhausted

    Marie shared a story:

    Please read comment I posted in facebook…CORA MAE FUBDERBURK

    Stephan shared a story:

    A fight against injustice
    Love lasts forever. There is nothing more powerful than the bonds of true love and true happiness between two people. Nothing at all that trumps a lifetime spent together.

    IMG_0943.JPGNothing at all, except the judicial system. At the end of your life, when you are in your final moments, and you are barred from spending your last breath with your loved one, only then do we truly realize the extent of this broken system.

    My name is Stephan Showstark, and I would like to raise funds to fight the injustices I faced when I was prohibited from seeing my wife before she passed away.

    My story is a tragic and immoral disruption to the marital bliss shared by two elderly people. The 21-year relationship blossomed over time to include Susan, my daughter and three children from Susan’s previous marriages. The children had been living with their biological father until their lives were damaged to such an extent that they fled to be with their mother and me. My only daughter was included in this extended family. Our blended family laughed together, cried together, and endured the many heartaches and fears as well as the many joys and moments of triumph associated with living in a family environment. Susan, my daughter and Susan’s children were the love of my life and the focus of my world.

    I raised Susan’s children as though they were my own, affording them every advantage, including college education, travel, the best schools and a home. Sadly, I was met in return with a manipulative legal scheme to break up my marriage and profit from its demise at a time in our lives when we were most vulnerable.

    img_1048Susan was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor in Gainesville, where we lived. That diagnosis led to countless treatments and research, and a total of three surgeries over one year, including numerous medications, chemotherapy and surgery. I explored every possible means of securing her well-being worldwide and hopeful cure, never leaving her side. Her condition created paranoia, confusion, and other ill effects for that year.

    On November 26, 2013, one of my stepchildren secreted my wife from me when she was having post-op suture removal following her third surgery in Miami. I was waiting for Susan in a doctor’s office while she went downstairs for a CAT Scan when a nurse informed me that they no longer had knowledge of Susan’s whereabouts. My search for her resulted in my learning she was with my stepdaughter. I returned to my hotel to pack and join them when my stepdaughter called to say she owed me no explanation for what was happening with Susan and hung up on me. They had taken her from the hospital under false pretenses, had Susan change her will and give them power of attorney, and then offered to let me hold her hand only in exchange for money. I was never allowed to see Susan, my wife and partner of 21 years, ever again. Rather I was divorced from her in 31 days after she was taken (and 66 days after her last surgery to relieve paralysis) at a hearing that included no medical testimony nor myself being present. Susan was testifying incoherently, not answering questions and was often having to be directed back to the original question by her attorney and the judge. On May 27, she called me twice, twenty minutes apart. I called her back in between the two calls to tell her that I missed her, I loved her, and I wanted to be with her. She sounded as though someone had a hand over her mouth when speaking into the phone. I immediately called the administrative offices at the facility she was staying at and begged them to send a nurse to her room to check on her. The administrator told me that he couldn’t do that because it was a “legal matter.” If someone is in need of help, they should receive it, to which this man repeatedly ignored my request and Susan’s needs, furthering the scheme to separate me from my wife. This is my last memory of her, as I did not speak to her or see her again before she passed away on June 9, 2014.

    I have been in the court system for over two years now, filing appeals on the fact that having this court hearing in Miami was unjust and illegal. We live in Gainesville, Florida, which is where the hearing should have taken place (not that there should have been a hearing in the first place). My guardianship attorney received an extortion e-mail that said if I drop the appeals they will find a way that I could be with my wife in Hospice. This exploited Susan’s mental incapacity for financial gain.

    Lies given to the Gainesville Judge, hiding of the new Power of Attorney my wife signed from courts that had not been addressed by the Judiciary, the Judge’s refusal to recuse himself, laws not being carried out and adhered to. Also the Judge in Miami stating, “Oh I know brain cancer,” to my wife’s attorney and step children. Susan had a medical episode the day before the divorce. She could not swallow and was paralyzed and appeared in court that day in a wheelchair with an aide. These are the injustices I wish to fight.

    The divorce gave my wife’s children the entire inheritance of her will. They robbed me of the last few montimg_0595hs of my wife’s life to make a profit off of her death.

    I am both heartbroken and enraged by what has happened. My wife died shortly thereafter, never comprehending the tireless efforts I made to get back to her.

    I hope to prevent this kind of injustice from occurring to families in the future through judicial policy reform.

    My goal is to reform the judicial system to require judges to be ethical, lawful and just. These individuals are responsible for you and your families’ futures when you enter the courtroom, and many judges abuse this power. I will lobby for a new department to be created which will be responsible for monitoring judicial practice. This department will be held accountable for the manner in which judges conduct themselves. You will be able to contact this department with complaints of a particular judge or lawyer, and the department will then raise an investigation as to their conduct. The department will employ a regulatory force to monitor judges during trials, specifically monitoring the inconsistencies of the judiciary to encourage lawful behavior.

    I in no way believe that the capricious judge or lack of judicial curiosity of a lawyer is the rule, but rather the exception. However, it is necessary to adopt some way to report and right an unjust situation should it ever arise.

    To accomplish these goals, I am raising money to fund fees, consultants and other expenses that come along with this kind of legal campaign. Please consider donating to my campaign. Additionally, if you or any of your connections have any experience moving legislation through the system, these contacts would help many people and I would be very interested in hearing from you.

    I in no way wish to profit from your donations, but will use the money to fight these injustices from occurring in the future. This type of inconsistency by judges and exploitation by the judicial system must be stopped. Please join me in my efforts to bring an end to the abuse of people from the lawyers and Judges of the Family Courts. Many people have been abused by opportunistic members of this group. Together we can stop them.

    Please click here to help me raise funds to fight this injustice I faced

    Clara shared a story:

    I’m the youngest of 7. My oldest brother died in 1981. My mother died May 1, 1992. She left her insurance to me. But it wasn’t enough too cover everything. My siblings and I put in the rest and I signed st son n over her life insurance at the funeral home. Mom had picked out the cemetery, plot and her stone. Well, in 2007 my oldest sister died. Her oldest son, (my nephew) made arrangements. The day of the funeral as I drove up to the cemetery, I realize that my mom’s graveside has not only been disturbed but they were pulling my mom out of her already resting graveside. I felt my heart drop. Well under my nephews orders they moved my mother to where my sister was being buried because they wanted them buried together. I was sad, furious, angry and emotionally grieve stricken. I didn’t say anything to y sisters adult children. But felt that it was wrong of them to disturb my mother’s grave especially without our permission. And the owners of the cemetery, how dare them move anyone without the next of kins permission! I don’t know the law on this but I feel that we deserve at the very least an apology. Can anyone just say "I want this person moved (who is already resting) without the permission of the next of kin? Can I do something about this?
    Sorry Mom.

    Mickie shared a story:

    North Carolinians, please help!! There is a visitation bill that has been drafted. It’s House Bill 539. This is a great step forward, but the bill is limited. It only covers elderly adults who have either been legally deemed incompetent or have been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or dementia. I feel it needs to include any incapacitated elderly adult who is being cared for by a caregiver. In my case, my mother-in-law had a stroke. She has not been found incompetent but is under her husband’s constant care due to the profound effects the stroke had to her mobility and speech. Even though she can make her own decisions, he is doing so for her and is picking and choosing who she can spend time with or speak with on the phone. Unfortunately, her son and me are people he’s decided she doesn’t need to be in contact with. I have left voice mail messages with the primary sponsors of this bill and have emailed the NC Aging Committee members who helped draft the bill. Please, if you can, call, email or write the members of the NC Aging Committee to let them know that no elderly adult under supervision by a caregiver should be left out of this bill. We want all our elderly loved ones to have the right to spend time with their relatives. Thank you.

    Lisa shared a story:

    Anne Shea, Elder Abuse of WWII, Holocust Survivor

    My mother, Anne Shea, is a 94 year old survivor of the Holocaust and part of the Nazi resistance, saving many Jewish children from being put on a train to a death camp.

    In the 40’s, my mother was one of a very women who had college degrees. Her family were teachers and she followed in the “family business”. One day the Nazis came and took her roster of children.  She taught all grades. The Nazi’s called out all of the Jewish students and carted them off never to be heard from again. The same with their families.  Anne Mack ,a devout Catholic, on her own, went to the parish priest at the Catholic Church.  She convinced the priest to give baptismal certification to all her Jewish children. She changed their names and the priest gave her the documentation.  Anne Mack did this alone. There were no others to assist her in saving the Jews from the Nazis. She was a young teacher and understood what would happen if she was caught. 

    At the time, the American’s occupied the Sudetenland, her home.  Americans turned over the territory to the Russians.  The Nazi’s caught on to what she was doing and came after her. She hid in homes, attics and, barns, trying to get a message from behind enemy lines to an American soldier that she fell in love with.   Her mother was almost beaten to death when she would not inform on where my mother was. My grandmother suffered from the trauma for the rest of her life. After a week, Private Gerry Shea, got the message and he planned on his own to rescue her. They agreed to meet in the cemetery where my Dad first met her.  He took a US Jeep, bribed the Russians with a carton of cigarettes, and went to pick her up. She hid in the jeep with only a blanket covering her. They made it safely to the US Occupied Germany by bribing the enemy with a bottle of whiskey. The experience with the Nazi’s left Mom traumatizes for a long time and she becomes extremely confused and fearful when she feel threatened.
    Now we are in 2010. My Dad died in 1998 after a stroke and my s husband and soul mate died on our 23rd wedding anniversary in 2005 of pancreatic cancer. Mom had a several mini strokes where she could not talk or respond to us. She was deeply depressed.  I saw the same behavior in my Dad and grandmother before they had their major strokes. My son visited her at least twice a month while I dealt with my own profound grief. After celebrating my birthday in 2010, I noticed Mom was not dressed up like she would have been.  I attempted to call her for two weeks and eventually learned from a security guard at her Riderwood apartment that she had suffered a stroke.  Riderwood demanded that my mother needed a guardian, which I assumed would be me, an only child. Instead, the judge appointed at least four attorneys to attend to my Mom. At this time I was visiting her daily.  We want back to court and my atty, Ron Schwartz, proposed that our family attorney, Catherine Koester, be appointed guardian for six months, subject to my agreement, while I got Mom the care she needed. Then he said Catherine Koester would transfer the guardianship to me at that time.  

    Catherine Koester then moved my mother from Riderwood to Autumn Meadows because my mother was not getting adequate medical care. We became concerned when we learned that Catherine Koester had given instructions to the staff to disregard the medical issues I saw.  While in Autumn Meadows, her toes were ingrown, each nail was bloody and with so much fungus they looked worse than the example on the Mayo Clinic’s webpage.  It took them many weeks to get a doctor out to see her.  Mom could not walk because of the pain in her feet.  All this time, I asked when Catherine Koester would transfer the guardianship to me as we had agreed to… She never did so. Mom’s legal bills could have been as high as $100k by this time.
    On another occasion, Val, the house manager at Autumn Meadows, determined my mother had a UTI and needed antibiotics. Val went to the doctor she knew and got prescription medications.  Val was not a doctor. Both Catherine Koester and Val has the records for my mother’s medications. My mother is allergic to Cipro and ended up into the emergency room. Someone didn’t check my mother’s information that they has on file. NO ONE called me to tell me she was there in emergency. It’s a 15 min drive to the hospital. Lynn, Catherine Koester’s caseworker called me after 6 hrs to tell me. When I arrived with my husband, my mother was crying and screaming “thank you for coming Lisa”.  I asked Lynn, the caseworker, about the medical aspects of this allergic reaction and she threw her hands up and left. Not just the room, but the hospital. Luckily my husband and I were there until the doctor hospitalized her overnight because of the severity of the reaction. We left around 11am ??? and came back at 6am to find no caseworker. No one was there for Mom.  The doctor told us it took 24 hrs to be sure of a UTI, not 2 hrs. We drove her back to Autumn Meadows in the afternoon.  I was told by the AM staff that they were sick of  the Guardian’s interference between Anne and her family.  My mother was progressively denied the visit she needed. She felt isolated. She sat at the door waiting for my visits.  The facility thought Mom needed more than they could give her.  There were problems with dressing Mom and Mom looking for help.
    The Guardian then moved my mother from Autumn Meadow to Riva Terrace.  It was a dimly light house with no activities.  I looked them up on a Place for Mom and saw they claimed that they had a swimming pool, beauty salon, and a variety of meals. This was a lie. There was nothing there to do but watch Rt 2 traffic or watch 1 TV for 5 residents.  Time after time the caregiver said they were unhappy working with the guardian and her caseworker . They did not like denying visitors since Mrs. Shea got visited by only 3 family members whenever I brought attention to a medical issue or a dangerous situation, the guardian would cut my mother off all visits.  It was like torture for my mother to be so severely restricted. I noted AA County has sign in each home with numbers to call if you have any concern about a resident and I used that number.  My Mother was suffering from elder abuse by isolation.  The number the exact time and length of visits were progressively restricted. 
    When we first visited, we were required to take her out of the home, even though she could not walk and had no walker the 3 of us mentioned. When my son asked for a different schedule, since he was working, the Guardian would not change the 11am-3pm time. Normal people are at work during the 11-3 time frame. It came down that he loved his grandmother more and lost his job.  Each time the Guardian was displeased, my mother’s visits we further reduced or suspended. Years before she left, the caregiver told me the owner was very sorry she took my Mom because Catherine and Lynn were making so changes to visitation permission.
    In July 2017, I brought in my service dog as I had for years. She was always excited to spend time with Schatzi.  The caregiver started screaming at everyone including my mother who was holding the leash.  The caregiver told us there is no law for service dogs and she was throwing us out.  I called my son to come over as I was hoping to divert Mom’s attention while we left with the dog. The caregiver had no understanding of service dogs, ADA etc. We have tapes from July 3 & 4.
    Since July 3, 2016 I have only seen my Mom twice. Once was in September for her birthday, which we were required to meet on the home’s driveway for one hour.  The last time was on a cold Christmas day on the driveway. Between those two visits she lost so much weight and was talking only in German. The guardian allows Mom no calls or visits. Since mom speaks German, she has no interaction.

    Jan. 25, 2011
    From  Lisa Shea
    To: Ben Woolery Esq
    My Mother wants help and visits from Dillon and myself. She cries when we have to leave or can not make it the next day. She feels so isolated
    personnel. Visits cut back by guardian
    May 23
    Mrs. Shea abused when she said she did not want to go to the doctor with a stranger. It brought back nightmares from WWII. People grabbing at her trying to pull her out of home. Staff threatened her by telling Mrs Shea that the staff would lose their jobs if she did not comply. She was taken crying from the home. An unauthorized staffer drove Mrs. Shea in her person car without proper insurance or authorization
    June 2012
    Mrs Shea’s toe nails are so bad she cant walk. . Took photos.  She still cannot walk without pain and her feet are swollen.
    July 2011
    From Ms. Mattison
    To: CMK Guardian
    Requesting info on why Mrs. Shea was given a prescription she was allergic to;

    Why did the guardians appointed backup, Lynn Carr deserted Mrs. Shea at hospital’s emergency room after 6 hours. Ms Shea and husband were at the emergency room as soon as they were called 6 hrs into emergency
    Why did it take 6 hrs to call Anne’s daughter?
    Lynn left prior to the Dr decision that Mrs. Shea was ill enough to stay overnight. Dr said UTI test took 24 hours and Mrs. Shea did not have one
    On another day, Lisa was called to the home to help Mrs.Shea put on her pjs because of staff behavior. They called her to come over. Mrs Shea felt so depressed and isolated. Toenails still neglected impacting her ability to walk any where
    Oct 2012
     From Ron Dolinsky
    To Esq Paula Mattson and Lisa daughter (Lisa’s atty)
    Family’s concerned is that Ben does not have the pertinent medical information, such as but limited to:
    Anne Shea’s teeth (3-4) being pulled and given no RX pain medications. I had 2 pulled and the pain lasted 5 day on prescription medications

    Ms. Shea being left by the caseworker Lynn in the AAMC emergency room.  She felt deserted and scared. Mrs. Shea was isolated in a bed in the ER not understanding what was going on until I could translate. She begged me to take her home with me
    I was called by the case worker after 6 hours after incident.
    Casework walked out of emergency room and left the hospital. Ms Shea and husband stayed with Mrs. Shea until she was settled in a room.

    The Dr hospitalized her overnight because she had a fever.
    No ride home from the hospital were made by the guardian. Ms Shea went back to hospital to return Mom to Autumn Meadows
    Her crippling feet issues from ingrown toenails (10), fungus and blood under the nails still not addressed
    Sept 2012
    Autumn Meadows staff, Val went though Mom’s drawers and stole a sealed envelope for Atty Woolery.  Val also stole several cokes for Mrs Shea. Prior to taking Anne to lunch Lisa noticed a wet stop on Anne’s pants.  Renee said loudly in a packed a living room.” Annie do you need to change your diaper? Mrs. Shea got very upset over the lack of dignity
    To Shea
    From My Atty
    Guardians Response to my question about receiving pending matters was “I don’t know” (guardian.)
    ‘”I think she is no longer cooperating with me”
    “Guardian went over the line in a filing she made violating confedntial information”
    Aug 2012 toe nails finally trimmed
    Guardian expected problems with getting answers for Ms Shea’s health questions. Ms Shea was cut off whenever she asked Dr a question by CMK’s aide. Renee and Val told daughter Mother couldn’t’t go out until toes had been trimmed. They were trimmed and Mrs. Shea could finally walk out for lunch. Mrs. Shea felt threatened by the 2 aides and their screaming not to take Mrs. Shea out where she wanted to go . Lisa took her mother out to lunch.  Owner Ms Masters is not restricting staff communication to Ms. Shea and family.
    Aug 2012
    The owner agreed staff could answer my questions. She is going to facility to talk to her staff.  Any questions go to Ms Masters who will tell Ms. Shea. Anne is very upset and worried they will take her away like Hitler tried to
    Sept 6, 2012
    Atty Schwartz to Ms Masters owner of facility. Spoke to her no problem few weeks earlier. Guardian was now involved and they did not want to deal with guardian drama
    Oct 2012
    Oct 3 I went to Autumn Meadows and guardian moved my MOM out.  I had no idea on my birthday where she was. Guardian cuts off visits to the family. Based on an issue I talked to management about. Mom just sat in a chair all day
    Aug 28 2012

    March 1, Riderwood refused to let Mom eat lunch at the complex. An aide open the car door while I was backing up. Mom almost fell out of the seat but I had her belted in. Beltsville Police talked to Anne and wrote up a report that she wanted to leave Riderwood.  Riderwood did not get an EO to return my Mom
    Dr Schoor reviewed Mom and said Anne retained sufficient to pick her guardian who was her daughter. Dr Schoor filled out the mandated State certificate which indicated Anne had suffice capacity to consent to whom she wanted ad guardian.
    Anne went to
    guardians office to sign a will and a power of attorney form. How could
    guardian draw up these legal mandates if Mom couldn’t make her own decisions? I was the authorized guardian back up and had DPOA
    Guardian continues to allow no visitation despite Mrs Sheas isolated from family and friends.
    Nov 19, 2012
    Filed complaint for elder abuse
    My Atty agrees that guardian filings went over the line when she repeated in her filing that I was disabled by a brain injury.
    April 2013
    guardian denies any visitation to Mrs Shea by anyone.. I got thrown out by Lynn on Thursday when we were reading geman book together in Mom’s room
    Through the last 6+ years we have had visitation dangled before our eyes like extortion.  Back  and forth and the only one who suffers most is Mom.  Her screams of crying and screaming for us to comeback continue as we walk outside.
    July 2016
    I bring my service dog as I had for the previous 2 years. Mom think its her dog. The caregiver blow up and said there are no laws for service dogs. We quickly tried to get the leash from Mom. The only screaming was from the caregiver which we have on tape.  Next day my son Dillon visited (29) and the caregiver tormented him regarding his Omi on tape. I complained to the county about them taking nude photo of my Mom and showed it to me. My visits were terminated and to this time July to April 2017 I have had 2 1 hr visits with my Mom in the cold on the homes driveway. She loves seeing my dog because she thinks it her Schatzi.  My mother begged me to come see her but I said guardian wouldn’t allow it. All the calls revolved how scared she was and couldn’t manage the loneness because no one spoke german got a few phone calls but then the home REFUSED to answer the line during my calling time.

    I now have a granddaughter who my Mom always hope to have. Now we have no idea which hole they put Mom in and if they too take naked photos of the residents. We just want to see our Mom before she dies. I was told by the caregiver that would be the next time I would see her DEAD.
    I have spent all my savings about 60k and have no visit. The guardian wont let my 30 yo son visit with his daughter. He has done nothing as has my hubby who she loved.
    My Mothers only blood relative is Dr.Gerhard Mack in Germany. He has asked that call and visits be implement immediately since he would call his last living relative
    To this date I do not know if my Mother is still alive and the religious customs we have done for 100’s of years have not been implemented.

    I told my Dad in 97 I would always look out for Mom. What a mess. We tried mediation but CMK left after 5 minutes.